jaan//ziam

११.

'Namaste' the Raani yawns into the phone and Zayn can't help but feel guilty for waking her up like this.

'He's pregnant, maa' Zayn sobs into the telephone.

'Wha— Zain is that you?'

'Maa Liam's pregnant' Zayn repeats, his voice cracking.

'Kya? [What]' his mother gasps, sounding much more awake now, 'Zain I thought I said no sex until the vivaah [wedding]—'

'No' Zayn breathes out, and something sick twists in his gut, 'No, no—it's th–this guy he was having an affair with—'

'Oh Zain– no'

Zayn nods, bites his fist to stop himself from crying.

Stop being pathetic; you're the Emir!

And he feels irrationally angry, all of a sudden because he's the fucking Emir—he shouldn't be treated like this by someone of a lower class than him.

'Zain, beta– come back okay? We can always re–schedule this meeting! I'll send your private jet over to Jammu, I'll tell Karen and Geoff the truth' the Rani says when Zayn doesn't say anything.

Zayn doesn't reply.

'Zain? Beta, everyone makes mistakes. Usne heere ko choda hai, kiske liye? Koile ke liye [He left a diamond for what? For a piece of coal]—'

'Maa stop it!' Zayn yells, his head aching. The Rani stops abruptly, and Zayn feels guilty for a second.
She's just trying to help, after all.

'He hasn't left me' Zayn grits out and she sighs.

'Beta—'

And for the second time, Zayn's saying 'I–It's alright' though he's not sure it is. 'I will sort it out'

'Zain—'

'Maa thoda to bharosa rakho muj par?! [Mother have some faith in me?!]' Zayn yells, losing his patience. 'I swear, I will sort it out!'

And before she can reply, he bangs the phone down on the table and screams as loud as he can.

Liam and Harry have messed shit up too fucking much this time.

‡

The next time he sees Liam, it's at breakfast.

If anyone has the right to be distressed, it's Zayn, but Liam's puffy red eyes and chapped lips tell a different story.

They're forced to sit at the same table, because of prior reservations.

It's set up quite beautifully;  a crisp, white tablecloth with a velvety indigo table runner and soft orchid petals scattered around idly.

But Zayn doesn't take time to appreciate all the staff's efforts – as he usually does.
He just wants to finish his meal, and get the fuck away from this–this cheating bastard as soon as possible.

Liam glances at Zayn hopefully as he sits down.

Zayn ignores him and pulls out his pack of smokes.

'Zee, can we talk?'

Nothing. The Emir puts a ciggy to his lips and shuffles around for a lighter.

'Zee?'

'No. Shut up' Zayn grits out as he covers his mouth and lights the end of the ciggy.

Liam goes silent when he notices Zayn's own red eyes and dark circles.

'Zee' he pleads again, softer and places his hand over Zayn's.

Zayn jerks back and glares up at Liam. 'You wanna talk?!' he spits as he bangs the packet down on the table and flicks the cigarette across to Liam's end.

Liam looks down at the glowing cigarette, watches with blurring vision as a few embers fall to the tablecloth and gradually darken to mere ashes.

'No' he mumbles softly and lets out a choked sound, before looking up, 'Zayn please don't do this–'

'NO—LET'S TALK NOW' Zayn yells; feels all his pent up emotions bubbling over the brim — how dare Liam act like a martyr after all the shit he's pulled?!

'Zayn' Liam pleads, standing up, 'Please sit down — y-you're creating a scene–'

'THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT, HM? Creating a fucking SCENE?!' Zayn snorts disbelievingly, 'Okay, FINE!'

The Emir turns to the head of security and yells for them to “clear off”

Zayn and Liam watch as the man nods and quickly exits the room, followed by his team.

Then Zayn's turning back to Liam and sneering 'Oh, and call me Emir, like everyone else — you're no one special'

Liam bites his lip, feeling ready to cry already. He'd vowed he wouldn't but — how can Zayn be so hurtful?

'Zayn' he tries again and Zayn growls. He slams his fist down on the table and Liam watches with dread as his nails dig into the soft material.

'FUCK YOU LIAM' the Emir screams, a vein throbbing in his forehead, his eyes red and teary when he looks up.

Liam muffles a sob into his hands and Zayn bites his lip so hard, his teeth could break skin.

'I fucking KNEW that you were cheating on me —but I fucking let it go, thinking that you'd eventually leave him and somehow just–manage with me'

Zayn looks up at Liam with a disappointed frown and furiously wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

'I'm sorry–'

'I know I'm not particularly handsome' Zayn cuts him off, 'Neither am I very charming or friendly or lovable like your—your little friend'

'But—but I thought that you'd grow to love me as much as you loved him? As much as I love you?'

Liam can't help but crack a small smile at Zayn's words – he still loves him.

'You don't know how much I want to swear at you, scream, yell, rave, rant, slap you, punch you, kick you' Zayn tugs his hair through his fingers, confusion on his face, 'I don't know Li — I don't know what you've done to me, but–but I can't make myself do anything?'

At that he looks straight at Liam with sad, red eyes
'Whatever you've done to me — please reverse it. I wanna love you, but I can't.. If I do–' Zayn furrows his eyebrows, 'I'll only be cheating myself'

'I'm sorry' Liam cries softly, not really sure how to reply to all of this. It's all too overwhelming for him and he feels slightly nauseous.

But Zayn doesn't give him the chance to speak, instead grabs his arm and pulls him forward and Liam thinks he's gonna get punched square in the nose but—

...Zayn's lips are on his.

‡

...i am zayn in this fic. i trust too easily and i let people stamp all over me like a fucking doormat😊
not as edited as I'd like it to be, I'm v sorry 😓
are you happy about zayn's actions or nah?😐

...how's my drama scene?😂

goodnighttttt😴🌛🌑🌟🌌🌃🌉