The Journey We Face (A Sandor Clegane Fanfic)

Please

"Take everything into consideration." "Winter is coming." Those were the words that kept repeating through out her thoughts.

"I can't." She whispered quietly to herself, as she sat with her back against the old godswood tree.

Her knees were tucked under her chin, and she stared into the blacken pond before her.

"He cares about me, I know he does...I care about him." She kept looking into the small depth of the water, it swayed back and forth, glistening with the reflection of the Crimson leafs above it.

"In deep thought?" Robb startled her, making his presence known by the  sound of his thick northern accent.

She looked up at him, then back to her previous sight. "I guess." She muffled, against the sleeve of her gown.

He sat next to her, studying her features. "Care for a open ear, perhaps a shoulder to cry on?" She smiled lightly, still staring at the water.

"I don't know about crying, but I'll take that ear." He smiled, and wrapped an arm around her, waiting for her to began.

"A marriage with a Lannister, moving to Kings Landing, that isn't something I really ever thought I'd be doing with my time on earth."

she played with her fingers, looking up towards Robb. "Did your father give Robert an answer?" Robb returned her gaze. "Yes, the answer was, it is my choice. I thought I knew the answer."

"But?" he trailed off. "But,..now I feel so much guilt saying no. I know how important this alliance is, I know what it could do for our family. But I..I have feelings for someone else."

She bit her lip, feeling even more selfish when the thoughts turned aloud.

"I can't imagine Sandor taking this easy." her eyes widen, and she moved back, staring at him in shock. "What, like I didn't know?"

He smirked with a playful expression, and she remained silent. "How?" She began to smile. "It was obvious, ever since your return from the trip. The glances, the way you look at him. I know you Nymaria."

"I don't know even what it is we have, it's just been enjoying each other's company." She smiled a little, thinking of Sandor with fondness.

"And passionate love making?" He raised an eyebrow, and she pushed him. "No!" She softly yelled, shaking her head.

"Yes, there has been some kissing and touching. Nothing more though. I care about him, he makes me happy. But now, what's more important?"

Yes Nymaria thought she knew what she wanted, and she still does. But the guilt and selfishness she felt with this decision, was weighing heavy on her heart.

She knew what this marriage meant to her family, the honor it was for king Robert to propose such arrangements, with not one, but both his sons. That is what left her torn.

"What should I do?" She leaned her head back, staring at Robb. He always knew what to say.

"What feels right? Do you see something happening with Sandor? or do you see life in Kings Landing?"

He released his arm from Nymaria, keeping his eyes on her.

"That's the thing, Sandor doesn't even want to try because he feels I'll regret it one day. He told me to 'give it a chance.' With Tommen." She finished. Her heart sinking with the sentence.

"Then..maybe that's what you should do." He pushed himself up with his hand pressed against the tree, and stood. She looked up at him with a mild expression.

"Thanks, that really helped." She chuckled, her voice thick with sarcasm. She stood up, dusting herself off."

"Me, a Lannister?..my the gods can be cruel." She chuckled, and together the cousins walked back to their home.

It was back at the castle, just as Robb and Nymaria were returning, Tommen was looking for the young girl.

"Nymaria!" he yelled from across the courtyard, his face lighting up in delight by the sight of her.

"Your prince, awaits." Robb bowed, and chuckled, before turning around.

"Your grade." Nymaira smiled, and she walked closer to lighten the distance between them.

"Please, call me Tommen. I've been looking everywhere for you." He was now facing her. He had an innocent expression that did not help her choice.

"My apologize..Tommen. I just needed some time to think." She smiled, remembering the lessons from her septa.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh, okay." She stopped, and he grabbed her hand. Pulling her over to a small bench, as they sat, Tommen wasted no time, he interlocked their hands together, smiling brightly towards her.

Although he didn't know the northern girl, he did truly like her.

He wanted to get to know her, and was interested in how she carried herself.

How she talked, and the expressions on her beautiful face.

"My father, told me you would be deciding if we marry or not. I can't help but be curious as to what you are choosing."

She bit the inside of her mouth, looking away from the young boy is curious eyes.

She herself did not know what to do. "Well," she trailed off, "I haven't decided."

She looked back up at him, and saw the light in his expression dim to a sad one.

"But why? You'd be my lady, and a princess. Our children would be royalty." His voice gave way he was baffled by the answer she gave him.

"I know, and it sounds lovely, it really does. But I can't help wanting to marry for love, more then just an arrangement our fathers made."

She looked away again, not wishing to see his reaction. She felt bad..terrible, actually. not only was she disappointing her father, and her family, she was disappointing a really sweet boy.

"Please," He raised her chin with his fingers, to look at him. "It's not like love cannot grow over time. And I think I wouldn't have any trouble at all, loving you."

He smiled, and she smiled back. Before she even had a chance to react, Tommen had kissed her. His lips were soft, and lingering while he held her face.

Nymaira didn't kiss back, nor did it feel right. But none of that matter as he pulled away, he had a lingering smile on his lips. She almost slapped him,
but before anything else was done, she pulled her face away and her eyes came upon Sandor.

He had been walking out from the halls, the sight alone broke his already scarred heart.

Tommen had not noticed Sandor is sadden stare, he only had Nymaira's lips on his mind.

"Tommen, I have to go." She smiled sweetly, and got up trying to follow Sandor without giving anything away. Sandor didn't stay, he started walking as fast as he could. Away from her, away from the pain.

He couldn't look at her, he couldn't look at anything but a wineskin.

The fact was, Sandor knew she couldn't love him, he would never expect her to. But every time she kissed him, a little hope grew, that maybe she might.

He knew she'd end up with the prince, but seeing it was something entirely different. He knew it would break his heart. But now, it had shattered beyond his original thought.