Unlovable

Chapter 18

Darcie and Roger walked into the cabin after dinner, laughter fresh on their lips. Roger tossed her bags on the couch and plopped down next to them. Darcie sat beside him and giggled. She had a wonderful time that evening after dinner was finished; sitting in Lily's wooden, plant adorned deck and listening to her tell stories about Roger in his youth. It felt like she was becoming a part of their family, and the idea of it had her cringing and yearning for it at the same time.

"I'm glad you think it's funny," he said as he draped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her to his side.

She inclined into him. They had enjoyed a wonderful day together. Not only did they spend the day shopping and watching the sun go down, but they spent the majority of the night with Lily sharing anecdotes about Roger's youth. Darcie had stuck to her first impression. Lily was sweet.

"Try hilarious," she said, trying to stop the laughter.

Roger let his head roll back against the couch and looked to her, the edge of his mouth twisted up into a grin of his own.

"Oh C'mon!" he said bumping her thigh with his. "You're making me feel like a stalker. Can you honestly say that you weren't thinking about me after our first meeting? That you didn't want me to come over here?"

"Well, since you discussed it with Lily, I'm pretty sure you already know what I was thinking." Darcie countered with a nudge of her own.

Roger shook his head.

"I think I would like you to tell me."

Darcie looked over, letting her smile fall and rested her head against his shoulder.

"Maybe I thought about you. Much more than I expected I would. Every time I heard a car go by, if I was near enough, I would look out the window to see if it was you. And maybe I always had a little hope that it was."

"Why do you think that is?" Roger asked leaning his head on hers.

"Why was I thinking about you?"

"Why have we been thinking so much about each other? I mean, in the real world people don't just...I dunno...Mean so much to someone right away. It takes time. Weeks. Months. Years."

The two of them were silent a moment as they pondered this simple question.

"Do you believe in fate, Diane?"

Darcie bit her lip. Their attraction was something she had been contemplating for a while. She'd never felt this way about someone before- Not even about Harold. Even in the beginning, when Harold was still trying to impress her, did he make her feel like she was the only girl in the room- That she was the only one that mattered. He never took her breath away, like being with Roger did. Harold offered her stability, a home and at one point in time, he made her feel safe. That was why she married him.

Being with Roger made her feel safe in a whole new way. She felt beautiful, and comforted. He would never hurt her the way Harold had. He would understand. Being with him just felt like something she should be. It fascinated and frightened her.

"I believe that you make your own fate. I chose a house from a website, and you decided I wasn't crazy and sold it to me. Had neither of us done those things, we wouldn't be here right now."

"And where exactly are we? Are we friends? More than friends?"

"You know we're more than friends, Roger."

Roger beamed at her, satisfied with her answer and not wanting to rush a more detailed description of their relationship. They were more than friends, and for now that was enough for him.