Eve

I Want You Hard

Breathe in, breathe out. Just, relax...

I elongated my arm and knocked on the white door standing before me using the gold knocker that echoed the noise through the house on the other side. A soft padding of footsteps sounded, coming closer and closer to the door until the click of the lock slid open and the door swung inwards revealing a damped-looking figure with a white dressing-gown draped over him. Alex stood there slightly dumb-strook taking in what was in front of him with his mouth slightly open, trying to find his words. His face looked unshaven with black stubble covering his jaw and making its way above his upper lip; his hair was unkempt and flew away at the peak of his head, gel free.

"Hey." Was all I said.

"Hey." he replied.

"How are you?" I asked, normally asked as a general question but this time it was as a general concern for his well-being.

"I'm fine. How're you?"

"I'm good. Can I come in?" I asked as the wind had picked up and the hairs on my arms were starting to raise.

As if realising where he was, he gathered himself and said, "Oh! Yeah, of course! Sorry, come in." he stood to the side allowing me to enter through the door and into the hallway with the posters and vinyls on the walls. It took me back to the night when I first came here which seemed like months ago but was in actual fact, around two weeks ago. How time flies.

Alex led me into the kitchen where I sat down at the breakfast bar looking at him trying to organise himself in some way. There were takeaway boxes strewn upon one of the counters ranging from Chinese to Indian (I've never been fond of Indian food myself).

"Do you want anything to drink? Coffee? Tea perhaps?" he asked, looking quite nervous.

"Erm, yeah I'll have a coffee please." Realising how long it had been since I had had a hot beverage. Whilst the kettle boiled, he came and sat down opposite from me on the bar, perched on the edge of the stool as if he was going to run off at a moment's notice.

With the whistling of the kettle behind him, Alex said, "So, how've you been?"
"I've been okay I guess. You?"
"I've been fine, yeah. I'm alright..." after a few moments passed with him drumming a beat with his fingers on the counter he burst out saying, "To be honest no, I haven't been good. I've felt pretty shitty all week and I'm not exactly jumping for joy over anything. I thought you hate me and, not to be rude because I'm thrilled that you're here but I'm wondering, why are you here? Because my mind is kind of struggling to make sense of all of this and the more I think about everything, the shittier I feel." he finished saying just as the kettle clicked off signaling that it had finished boiling. I didn't say anything for a while, I just sat there staring at this brilliant man who has the mind of a musical genius; who's gorgeous looks has girls falling at his feet and men envying him, yet despite all of that can be reduced to solitude and misery resigning to the walls of his home all because of one girl. One simple, plain, ordinary girl from a completely different country who had never even listened to his work or knew who he was until she first met him! They had entered each other's lives and turned them upside down.

Alex leaned over the counter taking hold of my hands whilst the cold metal of his pinky ring brushed over my knuckle and said so softly one wouldn't have been able to hear, "I am so sorry for everything." I looked into his deep brown eyes which were completely open and vulnerable and removed my hands from his grasp causing a fleeting look of hurt fly across his face but disappeared when I placed my hands on either side of his face and kissed him gently on the lips. He shuddered with shock and surprise but soon composed himself just as I moved slightly back to look back into his eyes and say, "I know." before leaning back in and resumed kissing him.

After a few moments had passed, I took Alex's hand and led him into his living room with my steaming cup of coffee clasped in my other hand. We sat down on the luxurious sofa and I said to him, "These past few weeks have been hell for me. I have missed you like crazy but I was also pissed. Not just at you but also at myself. I over-reacted and it's my fault for blowing this out of proportion. You are such an amazing guy and I guess that I was just not used to all of," I signalled around me at the beautiful room, "this. You were amazing on stage and I was just hurt that I hadn't heard from you for so long that I was beginning to think that you just didn't care."

"Of course I cared! I was just worried in case the media and everything was too much for you and that it would ruin what we have. I really care about you Eve. A lot." And with those last few words, I put my coffee down on the table in front and kissed his gentle face. It was familiar and comforting even with the bristles of his stubble scratching against my face. I leaned back and said with a playful smile across my face, "Come on, we need to get you cleaned up." and took him to the upstairs bathroom.