Ache

Ch 1

"How did you know?"
She realized how ambiguous the question sounded the moment the last word slipped from her lips. It was vague and not at all what she'd meant it to be. What she'd wanted to convey with her question was something different altogether. And so before the young man beside her could even begin to reply she reiterated.
"How did you know he was the one for you I mean."
The young man sitting beside her on that brick wall, with his signature black leather jacket, dark tousled hair and equally dark blue eyes not once took his gaze off of the other younger man in question. While he was tall, handsome and shrouded in the dark shadows of mystery the other was like a beacon of pure, dazzling light. He was beautiful and gentle, pure and fair. With brown hair so light it was like looking at an endless shore of soft sand, skin so fair and untouched by any mark (save for an adorable mole just below the corner of his left eye) that it made others (women in particular) stare in awe and envy, lashes so light and long they brushed against his soft cheeks and lips a lush pink that always held a brilliant smile to them.
While the other was built strong yet lean the other was so slight and slender the word delicate often times came to mind while looking at and describing him.
They were opposites. Complete and totally wrong for each other. One living in a world full of light and life, the other in a world of cold darkness and mystery the likes of which she couldn't understand. Yet, the love they felt for each other... simply the way they looked at one other was enough to tug at one's heartstrings. They not only lived for each other, if one of them were to die then the other would surely follow unable to go on without his other half.
Theirs was such a beautiful love. Full of hardships yes and forces trying to tell them otherwise but it was a love and bond which rivaled any in human existence.
At least, that's the way she saw it.
Her friend and his lover had the kind of relationship she ached for.
When she turned to look at him, the young man beside her watching the other there was such a soft tenderness there. A warmth that only existed for his lover. She didn't need him or anyone else to tell her, she knew: he was utterly in love.
The type of love where death was a sacrifice he would not nor could not make, not when it meant being unable to see the other ever again.
It was strange. The first time she met him she'd bluntly asked him if he was really gay. It had been rude and perhaps even uncalled for on her part she admitted but here was a smoking hot guy who was straighter than a ruler claiming to be in love with her sweet, innocent friend and so her overprotective mama bear instinct had kicked in. He hadn't even blinked though at the inquisition she put him through, merely took her friend's hand in his and without once taking his gaze off of her told her:
"What does it matter? Gay, straight, bisexual- they're just labels. I don't need to fit myself into any one of those categories to justify who I fall for. I just happened to fall in love with a man and that's all there is to it. To me it doesn't even matter that he's a man, as long as I feel what I do for him that's all that matters."
Needless to say, she believed him. And felt every shred of well deserved embarrassment, shame and immense joy that washed over her all at the same time at the moment. He'd spoken with such whole-hearted earnestness it had been refreshing. And his words had resonated so deeply within her that she'd found herself crying and asking for their forgiveness for ever doubting.
She smiled at the memory. God she'd been an idiot. She shook her head smiling.
A long time went by without either of them speaking. They simply sat beside each other on that wall; him gazing at his smiling, gentle lover across the field with a group of classmates and she switching between staring at the young man beside her and the object of his affection.
It was during that moment of silence where she realized how intrusive her question might've come across and she blanched. She didn't want him to think her nosy or as if she were prying into their privacy. Shame, embarrassment and guilt flooded her, making her face flush a bright pink.
"You don't have to answer that. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"He cried for me."
His voice was soft when he cut her off. Gentle even. Not at all upset or even annoyed by her question. It made her pause and turn her attention solely to him and though she wanted to she didn't speak. He hadn't stopped looking at the other young man. She waited for him to continue.
"He was the only person to ever cry for me."
His dark midnight blue eyes grew dark with memory, his voice bitter. Something in his past had been so terrible that it had left him lacking. He lacked emotion at times and seemed cold and distant. Whatever it was he'd experienced in the time before he met his lover had taken something from him. Something that made him human. He stopped talking and watched his lover for a long, long time. She watched in silence as the cold, darkness in his eyes slowly, ever so slowly began to melt.  Saw in awe how the tension in his body eased until he sighed a deep breath. It seemed to her like he was finally calm. At peace.
"Heh, even with his nose running, his face blotched red and those eyes of his so swollen from the fat tears streaming down his cheeks... He was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen."
A small smile tugged at his lips and his gaze flooded with warmth once more.
"When I told him so all he could do was stare with his mouth gaping, eyes wide and the most beautiful shade of pink blossoming on his cheeks."
She found herself smiling then too along with the boy as he recounted the sweet memory of their first meeting those two years ago. The memory he was reliving was practically playing before her own eyes and the image alone of the boy in question made her chest bubble with warmth and laughter. It was as if she'd been there as well.
"When I kissed him and tasted the tears he'd shed for me, for me of all people, it was the sweetest taste in the world. And it was then that I knew; never mind that we'd only met, never mind that he'd nearly ran me over- I didn't even have to know anything about him then to know that I would spend the rest of my life at his side. And that I would make sure he would spend his by mine."
She shuddered at the intensity of both his words and his gaze. It was so deep, so raw and oh so powerful it left her breathless. Her heart bloomed a thousand times for them.
"So in answer to your real question here,"
She blinked. Frowned. Then all too quickly flushed. He on the other hand gazed at her from the corner of his eyes and smirked.
"I guess I'm not as slick as I imagined myself to be huh?"
He raised a brow.
"Slick huh?"
She punched his arm. "Shut up."
He shrugged and turned his attention back to his tiny adorable lover. He was laughing at something one of his classmates had said. The entire air around him seemed to swell with it, the joy he felt, the sweetness of his laugh. Transfixed they watched as he gently brushed away the long sandy fringe from his eyes and waved goodbye to the group before turning and heading towards them.
"Feeling selfish, jealous of anyone who comes close to them while at the same time wanting others to see them, to have their presence in the world known by all because they're so special- that's only the start. Thoughts of them being the first thing you have in the morning and last thing on your mind at night follows soon after. Just a smile will make your entire universe light up whereas one single tear they shed will shatter and darken your world-
You want to monopolize them. Have them all to yourself. Have them as dazzled, enchanted and enraptured by you as you are by them.
That's how you know."
He turned to face her and offered her a small smile.
"Don't force it. That's not how it works, believe me when I tell you that it took me a very long time to find it even when I wasn't even searching for it. It's completely unexpected and hits you so hard it's mind blowing. When and if you find what it is you're looking for,"
He turned back to gaze at his lover who by now was halfway to meeting them all the while brushing the long fringe of sandy hair from his eyes.
"You'll be so scared by the overwhelming feelings flowing in and out of you that you won't know what to do with yourself."
He didn't even wait for her to reply then, simply hopped off the wall in one smooth motion and met with his lover before he even made it to where they'd been sitting. His hands automatically reached for the other, as if they'd been waiting an eternity to touch him. Long fingers brushed soft sandy hair behind the other's ear while midnight blue eyes gazed longingly into bright blue and gold heterochromic eyes. Even from where she sat she could see the pink blooming on her friend's pale cheeks as he looked up at his tall, imposing lover. His own slender hands were gripping the waist of the leather jacket at this one's waist for dear life. And then the other leaned down and brushed his lips softly against the other's waiting ones.
She couldn't help the blush that stained her own cheeks as she watched the two come together. It was the most intimate thing she'd ever witnessed and yet also the sweetest.
She sighed.
How she hoped he was right and that her special someone was out there somewhere pining away for her as well.