The Brother

1

“Today we are here to remember Raymond Tyson Chambers.” The Priest went on. I tuned out of the speech, because I could not stand to hear about all the amazing things about him. I stared at the casket. It was hardwood and maroon colored. I couldn’t imagine Ray lying in there. There was a picture standing next to it. He was happy in the picture. His hair was combed and reached to the bottom of his ears. And he was wearing a suit with a blue tie. It was the day of senior prom.

The crash gave me a fractured wrist, thirteen stitches, and bruises all around my body. The car hit Ray’s side. I distracting him. He missed the stop sign because of me. I would tell everyone that, but they said it wasn’t my fault, and I shouldn’t be putting myself down because of it.

It was my fault.

And only my fault.

My eyes were red and puffy for one whole week. Every day, I cried for at least an hour. I tried to ignore the Priest talking, but it was all too much for me. “Raymond saved an orphanage, Raymond saved the animal shelter.”

Then he said my name. “His beautiful girlfriend, Audrey Sophia Romano, would like to say a few words.” The Priest gestured me forward. I nodded and walked up to the podium. The crowd stared back at me. I glazed over the crowd, seeing unfamiliar faces, but one.

Ray.

“Ray?” I said into the microphone. He looked just like Ray, exactly. But there was something different about this Ray, something I couldn’t put my finger on. It wasn’t him though, I could feel it wasn’t him, but I was still drawn to him.

I cleared my throat. “Ray wa- was amazing.” I choked out. “I remember being in the car with him the night he died. He- he told me he loved me.” I looked down to Mrs. Chambers. In her hand was a tissue, dabbing away the tears.

I couldn’t talk anymore. Instead I burst out crying, so the Priest and Mr. Chambers helped me back to my seat.

I silently cried on my mother’s shoulder for the rest of the service.

After everyone went to the other room to eat, I stayed in my seat, staring at the casket. I didn’t want to imagine him in there, lifeless. I took a deep breath and let it out. I heard heavy footsteps and I turned around.

The fake Ray.

He sat behind me. “Who are you?” I asked. He looked exactly like Ray, but with this dangerous vibe, I swear, but he was more built. He wore a black opened shirt, with a black jacket.

“I’m Seth Chambers, Ray’s brother.” He said and looked at me. He was beautiful just like Ray. “So you’re the famous Audrey he’s been talking about constantly for four years.” He grinned.

I totally forgot. Ray had a brother in medical school. I was always away when he visited. “Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot he had a brother. Sorry I never met you.” I held out my hand. He shook it. His hands were soft and warm, just like Ray.

“No worries, I wasn’t around a lot. Med school is long and hard. You guys together would’ve made it fun.” He smiled, just like Ray. “I assume you thought I was Ray when you first saw me, am I wrong?” He pulled something from inside his jacket pocket, a silver flask. “Sorry, it keeps me from getting emotional.”

“I get it.” He took a sip and handed it out to me. I shook my head and he shrugged. “Yeah sorry. I have never seen you before, so,” I sniffled.

“Understood, everybody gets up mixed up.” He laughed and stood up. He extended his hand. “Want to grab something to eat, you look starving.” He was right. My cheeks were hollow and my eyes were sunken in underneath the makeup. I haven’t eaten anything since yesterday morning.

“Sure,” I smiled back and looked into his twinkling blue eyes, the ones that reminded me of Ray. I took his hand and we walked to the mess hall.

That afternoon, I sat on my bed looking at old pictures of Ray and our friends. Most of them were at the beach or at dances. We were all huddled up with our friends, smiling. Ray and I would stick out the most in most of them. We were what the school called “hottest couple.”

Ray’s ashy blonde hair brightened next to my dark brown hair. His electric blue eyes and my fierce forest green stuck out from all the dull brown eyes around us. Our deep tan skin with bright shirts illuminated the dark background.

I started to tear up again.

Tomorrow I have my first therapy session. My mom and dad thought it would be a good idea for me to talk about my feelings about Ray and how I should cope with his loss. I didn’t refuse to go, I agreed with them. I loved to talk about Ray anyways. I think I would like to brag about how great my boyfriend was.

Then I thought of Seth, Ray’s doppelganger. I found out a lot about Seth. He wasn’t like Ray at all. He never participated in charities or fundraisers. He was the lazy, obnoxious, rebellious brother. Ray’s family often looked down on him. I did not want to get involved in that.

My door opened. “Hey, I think it’s time for lights out.”  My petite mother appeared in the doorway. “Therapy starts at 11:00, so wake up.” She gave me a comfortable smile and closed the door silently behind her.

I packed back up all the pictures and put them on my top shelf. I got into bed and lied on my side. All I could think about was how it was my fault that the car crashed, and Seth.