The Brother

2

When I first stepped into Dr. Hunter’s room, I felt completely comfortable. The walls were a light woodland green, the flooring was medium toned wood, and the seats were black leather. Her room was not cluttered, which helped me think more.

Dr. Hunter was a small slim woman with a blonde bob cut. She wore expensive clothes from Marc Jacobs, Guess, etc.  “Hello, Audrey.” She stood up and shook my hand. Her voice was soft and gentle.

“Hi,” I whispered. To be honest, I was nervous. I have never been to therapy before, but I agreed on going, and I thought it would really help out.

“You are a beautiful young lady. Tell me about yourself.” She got out a notepad and pen and started scribbling something on it.

I clasped my hands together anxiously. “Well, um, I’m a Gemini? My favorite food is tomatoes? I like to read?” I didn’t know what she meant by “tell me about yourself.” There’s not much to tell.

“Great! What do you like to read?” she asked.

“Romance, fantasy.” I nodded and broke eye contact to look around the room. I bit my lip, worried about her response. I stared at a painting on the wall of a rural outdoor community. It reminded me of a book I read when I was a kid that taught you about urban, suburban, and rural communities.

“So how was the funeral? Did you cry? What were your emotions?” She leaned into her chair and stared into my eyes intently.

“I was sad of course. I cried… a lot.” I shook my leg.

“How did Raymond- its Raymond right?” I nodded, “make you feel?”

How did Ray make me feel? “Ray wasn’t like any other boyfriends my friends had. He was… different.” Different sounded cheesy, but it was the only word that fit into what I was about to say.

“Different how so?” she looked down at her notepad again and started writing something.

“Well, most boyfriends I’ve seen treat their girlfriend’s like trash. They call them beautiful and pretty yes, and hot of course. But Ray never called me hot, he thought it was vulgar. He never talked bad about anyone. He did things no other high school boy did in their free time.” I could feel my eyes starting to water.

“What did he do in his free time?”

“Fundraising! Volunteering! All the time!” I smiled wide trying to draw back the tears into my eyes. “I would help out every time. He saved so many people.” I looked off. I didn’t save him. “He was just… perfect.”

“He sounds great.” She smiled back.

I felt something cold run down my cheeks. I wiped it away quickly so she wouldn’t notice, but she grabbed a tissue and handed it to me.

“The worst part is…” I started to sob, “I distracted him.” I broke out wailing. I grabbed a bunch of tissues and stuffed them on my face. My face was heated and my eyes were a watery.

“And how does that make you feel?” she said under the cries.

What the hell? What kind of question was that? She thinks my depressing screams don’t say enough? “SAD!”  I yelled. “WRETCHED, MISERABLE, DEPRESSED! What does it look like!?” I screamed and threw a pillow at her.

“Good! Let it all out.” She encouraged. I kept throwing pillows and her and screaming. I really hoped this room was sound-proofed.

A few minutes later I finally calmed down. I lay on the couch, glass-eyed. I was all out of tears. “It was not your fault, Audrey.” Dr. Martin said. “He should have paid attention.”

“That’s what everyone keeps telling me…” I whimpered.

“Did you like seeing his friends and family again? Did you meet anyone new?” She changed the subject.

I thought of Seth. “Yeah, I met his older brother, Seth.”

“How is he?” she tucked her hands under her.

“The opposite of Ray.” I sighed.

“How is he the opposite?” she asked.

“He’s… lazy and selfish. A troublemaker. A troublemaker doctor.” I smeared away more tears that started to stream down my face.

After the session was over, Dr. Martin informed me that there was a coffee machine down the hallway. I had not drunk my morning coffee, so I was thrilled with the awakening news. I stood in line. A blonde man was in front of me pouring a glass of coffee while his head was cocked on his shoulder with a phone in-between. His cologne was strong, too strong.

“Yes mom, I will pick up his stuff after I grab a bite to eat.” A few seconds passed. “Yes, I am drinking, if you are assuming coffee, yes.” More seconds passed. “Okay, bye mom.” He hung up and turned around.

Seth.

“You’re Audrey right?” he gave me a repulsed face. “Little girl, will you stop following me?” I do not know what happened to the Seth I met yesterday, but this one was a jerk. The one I met yesterday was kind to me. He wore a black silk t-shirt and black skinny jeans.

“Um excuse me,” I raised my eyebrows. “I don’t know who you think you are, but I was here for a therapy session. Why are you following me around?”

“It’s kind of hot when a girl does therapy.” I glared at him. “Whatever, I’m an intern here.”

“You listen to people’s problems?”

“Yes, and I’m not getting paid right now, so I don’t want to talk to you.” He shoved the coffee pot in my hand. It burned me right to the touch and spilled all over me. My white shirt, ruined. “Too bad, by the way, cute bra.” He walked away.

I just stood there with my arms out and an “o” shaped mouth.

Yup, he was nothing like Ray.