Not His Juliet

Chapter 8

Lone Star by K. Jessica Ramirez

Chapter 8:

You know I never thought I'd ever sink this low. I've gotten into some pretty shit situations before but never could I have guessed that my own fiancé would make me so angry and hurt me so deeply that I'd run off into the dark of a town I don't know. Just fucking wonderful.

Back in New York I was on top of everything, I had control but here I'm only as powerful as I keep pretending I am. I hate not having control of anything. My whole life has always been a world of chaos, maybe that’s why mom always pushed me to hold a powerful position in the business world, even if it almost killed me to try and reach all the expectations she held for me.

My own tears run down my face as I wipe them away irritably. Soon after even my own tears stop coming, leaving only hallow sob to rake throughout my body. My eyes feel sore and I know they must look blood shot from the hours of crying. My body feels so utterly weak and broken. I hate to cry. I can count on one hand the numbers of times I've cried in my entire life.

I don't know what's pushed me to cry over what James did. Maybe it's the fact that I feel so vulnerable and alone in a town I don't know surrounded by people who hate me and probably wish I was dead or maybe I'm getting my period soon. I'm going with the first one though, makes me look like less of a prissy. 

Not only does crying emotional and physically drain me but it makes me angry for letting anyone or anything get to me to the point of making me break down in tears. Without realizing it I'm quickly over taken with a dark state of unconsciousness. I quickly welcome my usually always denied sleep. Anything will be a relief from my state. 

I can make out small rustling somewhere close to me but I can't will myself to get up or even open my eyes. My body feels stiff and my head is pounding. Whatever I'm sleeping on is hard and itchy. The rustling becomes louder. I moan for the noise to go away. It stops for a moment and I smile content with the peace.

Suddenly a childlike scream fills my ears and I bolt upright. My eyes immediately train in on the small boy of maybe three years old. He has curly brown hair, crystal blue eyes, and a small nose with a splatter of light freckles. He looks so familiar... but I haven't seen an actual child in years.

The child holds my gaze with wide eyes.

"Daddy!" The young boy screams bloody murder.

Cringing I throw my arms over my head. The pounding in my head is now a hundred times worse with each noise. Will someone shut this kid up! The kid screams again louder. Like a trigger all my memories of last night come trickling in. Quickly I take in my surroundings and realize I am in fact in a barn. The kid screams again.

"Hey honey calm down I'm not going to hurt you." I say soothingly to the boy.

He hesitantly nods in my direction, finally stopping his screams but watches my every move with rapt wide eyes.

"Want to tell me your name sport?" I ask offering him a small smile that I hope doesn't resemble too much of a grimace.

The young boy smiles at me and I swear I know that smile but I just can't place him. Who is this kid?

"Ma names Jessie ma’am" the young boy answers automatically taking off his cowboy hat and bowing a little bit.

"Okay Jessie I'm Angela, is it okay if I call you J for short?" 

"Whatever will please you ma’am"

Awe what a gentlemen. How adorable! I haven't seen an actual gentleman in years let alone a young boy. James should take damn lessons from him. I smile at J, he is just too adorable.