I didn't get chlamydia,
From a girl called Lydia,
She was kind of hairy,
It was a little scary.
I didn't get gonorhea,
From a girl called Maria,
Which was kind of lucky,
Since she was rather mucky.
And we were like ooh ooh ooh,
And she were like aah aah aah.
I didn't get HIV,
From a girl called Sally,
She was far from new,
It could have been easy to do.
I didn't get crabs,
From that hooker named Babs,
I was quite shocked,
I mean come on wouldn't you be.
And we were like ooh ooh ooh,
And she were like aah aah aah.
I didn't get genital warts,
From Voldemort,
He doesn't have hair down there,
Or anywhere.
I didn't get no STI,
From a random guy,
Cause i don't swing that way,
I'm not gay.
And we were like ooh ooh ooh,
And she were like aah aah aah.
If you wanna go out and have some fun,
Just remember my rule number one,
You gotta wrap it,
Before you tap it.
Cause it won't be so fun,
When you're sufferin' from,
An STI.
