A Sweet Misery - an Adam Levine Fan Fiction

Chapter 36

   There it was. Mr. Adam Levine's house. Amy had stalled as much as possible by taking the long way there and creeping along the streets at a snail's pace, but somehow, she still managed to arrive much faster than she would have liked. 

   Taking a deep breath, Amy bravely marched on up the walkway. The mansion loomed closer with every step. She climbed up the stoop with ease and suddenly she was faced with the monstrosity of the front door. 

   Instinctively, Amy's finger launched out to press the glowing button on the door frame, but she caught herself before she did.

"To ring the doorbell or knock..."  Amy pondered.

   She settled on knocking instead, as a doorbell always gives the impression that the person has arrived for a friendly visit, and that was exactly the opposite of what Amy wanted at the moment.

   Three firm, but not entirely loud knocks on the door and Amy was left to wait for what felt like a dreadfully long eight seconds. What would Adam say to her? What would she say to him? Would he think that she was coming to apologize for screaming at him in the hospital? Would he think that she wanted to get back together with him? God, she hoped not. 

   Just then, footfalls made their way down the stairs. A second of air and then-

   "Amy." A surprised Adam stood in the doorway and gaped down at her.

   "Adam." She responded curtly to somewhere beyond his head and into the kitchen. 

   "D-did you want to come in?" He stepped to the side and angled his body inward to offer her passage through the doorway. 

   "Yes, thank you." Amy breathed. Being polite was extremely difficult for her at the moment. She wanted nothing more than to lash out at him and break everything that he owned and burn the pictures of Behati that he had displayed in his living room. But, instead, she smiled with tight lips and stepped inside. 

   "Did you want anything to drink?" Adam rushed nervously about the kitchen, opened a few cupboards and retrieved two drinking glasses. He was halfway inside the fridge trying to locate a jug of lemonade when Amy answered his question.

   "Actually, I was just coming to get my things." As soon as she said it, she felt a pang in her stomach and winced. Part of her felt bad for Adam because he was trying so hard, but the other half of her hated herself for feeling that bit of guilt over him. He cheated on her and he was trying to act like everything was normal? Why should she feel any sympathy for him?

   "Oh. Right, okay." Adam let the fridge door shut on its own as he reached up behind his head to scratch the nape of his neck.

   Amy nodded briefly, then hurried up the stairs to avoid any more awkwardness between them.

   She had to admit, it was weird being in his house again. The hallways and rooms were all the same; Nothing had changed since the last time she had been there. Although, there was something different about it all. The feeling was different. Before, walking through Adam's home felt like warm sunshine and fuzzy socks, morning kisses and fresh pillows. Now, it felt like a draft on cold day, an echo in an empty street at night, the colour grey. Where there was once happiness before, there was emptiness now. 

   Amy pushed open the door to the master bedroom. The sweet smell of him was intoxicating. His side of the bed wasn't made and a couple of socks were kicking around at the foot of his bed. It was him nonetheless. 

   It was almost torture for her to step inside, as the good memories were unbearably strong. Giggles and quiet banter echoed off the white walls as Amy pulled open his dresser drawers. She found a t-shirt that was hers in one drawer, and a sweater of hers in another. They both smelled like him. 

   "Great. Looks like those are going in the wash," Amy thought. 

   On the way out, Amy spotted something on his bedside table. Coming in for a closer look, she realized that it was one of her hair elastics. As she pulled it onto her wrist, she noticed something else. It was a folded up piece of paper.

   "I really shouldn't snoop," Amy thought. "Eh, what the heck, he deserves it." 

   Grabbing the piece of paper with her right hand, she unfolded it with a finger and her thumb and was hit with another punch in the heart. It was the lyrics to the song they had wrote together that one day in the studio. A tear leaked from Amy's eyes as she read over them again, remembering how they had sung them as they pieced the song together. 

   Catching herself feeling too much emotion, Amy sucked in a breath, refolded the paper and replaced it back on the nightstand, like the way it had been before. She then looked at herself in the mirror and wiped her face clear of any moisture. She exhaled and configured her face to look like one of composure, then made her way down the staircase for the last time. 

   Adam was sitting at the kitchen table, a newspaper sprawled out across it. Amy knew he was only trying to busy himself. She knew he couldn't concentrate when something was on his mind. She watched as he looked up to see her with her belongings in hand. He stood up. The chair screeched against the floor. 

   "You have everything now?" Adam asked with an effort to sound relaxed, but panic was still seeping through. 

   "Uh, huh." Amy answered. 

   Adam walked her to the door. Time was running out. She had to say it.

   "I'm leaving California today." She looked at him in the eyes as she said it.

   "Today?" Adam's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed down the news. Amy nodded. "God, that's soon..."

   "Is it?" Adam didn't answer. She didn't expect him to. 

   "Well, I guess I'll be going now," Amy said, turning the door knob.

   Adam grabbed her wrist. "Don't go," he whispered. 

   "I have no other choice." Amy reefed on the handle, shaking Adam's hand away as she did so. She swung open the door and prepared to make a break for it.

   "Amy, I'm sorry." Adam pleaded.

    Amy turned to glare up at him. "Sorry doesn't cut it, anymore." She then turned on her heel and ran.