Pieces

Chapter 7

Spencer led me up the carpeted stairs and into her room. The walls were painted brown, with band posters and pictures covering the walls. A string of Christmas lights hung from the wall above her bed. Her bed was large, and the back headboard was a bookcase. At least twenty pillows were scattered on her bed and carpet.

"Your room is nice."

Spencer shrugged, fingering a tassel on one of the pillows. "It's alright. It's quiet in here. The kids aren't allowed in my room."

I couldn't remember if I saw her mom in the house when we walked in. i frowned and turned to look at her. "Where are your siblings and mom? Will she mind that I'm up here?"

"No, she's not home." She took a deep breath and exhaled loudly. "She said she uh, needed a break from everything. She dropped the kids off at their dad's and left." Spencer rocked back on her heels and sighed again, a quieter, more defeated sound. "I don't know where she went."

I didn't know what to say, so I stood awkwardly by the window and traced pictures in the dust on the windowsill.

Spencer crossed the room and hit play on her music, quickly turning it down as I flinched at its volume.

A beautiful red bloomed across her freckled cheeks. "I'm sorry! I didn't realize it was that loud."

I laughed. "It's okay. Blink 182?"

Spencer nodded. "If you don't like it, I can change it."

"No, no, it's fine."

Spencer nodded and sat down on her bed. "Were you planning on going for a run?" she asked, gesturing to my outfit.

"No, I just needed an excuse to get out of the house. To talk to you." Her eyes met mine, bring the red creeping back onto her cheeks.

"Why did you need to talk to me?"

"Because you wouldn't talk to me. Why have you been ignoring me? and don't just blow me off like you did in lunch."

Spencer studied me. I could almost feel her eyes poking and prodding at my soul, my mind, my heart. I swallowed hard and tried to suppress the urge to kiss her.

Eventually, Spencer sighed and crossed her legs under her. She slid back against the wall and patted the spot next to her on the bed. "Sit."

I hesitated. Spencer patted the empty spot again, throwing me a shy smile. When I finally sat down, Spencer smiled a bigger, and more friendly smile.

"Now can you tell me why you won't talk to me?"

Spencer's smile slipped off her face. "I'll try to explain. Just, don't say anything, okay?" Her blue eyes searched mine and waited to continue until I nodded.

"Of course."

"And I don't want you to say anything to anyone either, okay? Even if you think it's not a big deal."

"I promise." I watched Spencer run her hands through her hair as she thought. She dropped her eyes from mine and sighed.

"It kind of freaked me out when you kissed me. Not because I didn't like you or anything.. I do, a lot. I think you're a great guy.." Spencer toyed with her bracelets and sat in silence for a minute.

"This is so cliché." Spencer laughed at herself and glanced up at me. "I'm afraid to get close to you, because everyone that I've ever cared about has hurt me. And I don't mean just emotionally, I mean physically. I mean, you already know my mom hits me."

She sighed and looked back down. "The last guy I was with was twenty. He had his own apartment, by my old high school. I lived there because I couldn't deal with my mother. But then he started to hit me too. He called me terrible names, burnt me with his cigarettes.. And I know that you aren't like that, Chandler. I do. And I really do care about you.."

She trailed off into silence and bit her lip. She laughed nervously. "I don't know what else to say."

Her blue eyes were outlined in red, and it took me a minute to realize she was crying. I scooted closer to her.

"Hey.." I took her hands in mine and she looked up at me. "I am so sorry that you were put through that. And I think you are an amazingly strong young woman. Even if we stay just friends, I promise, I will always be there for you."

Spencer sniffed and blinked away a few tears. "That's a pretty lofty promise," she whispered. Then she smiled and rested her head on my shoulder. "Thank you, Chandler."

I kissed the top of her head and smiled into her hair. "You're welcome, Spencer."

She pulled away from me and looked into my eyes. She took her hand back and ran her fingers gently through my hair, smiling at me.

And then she kissed me.