It was coming to the end of the show and I had to say I was having a really good time although I found the situation slightly awkward for me. They were good, really good. The atmosphere in the arena was amazing and everyone was buzzing.
"Right this is our last song" announced Luke. They said that yet I new they would do one more after this, everyone always did. Calum and Michael made their way off the stage and onto the floor. "This is beside you, I wrote it at the beginning of the tour. Calum and Michael are going to chose four lucky girls that are going to accompany us. And josh will be playing the drums. As this is our last show we thought we'd do something special. Hey cal grab me one mate" Luke called down the mic causing the crowd to chuckle in response. Michael had already chosen his and ash's girls and was making his way with them back onto stage. Calum made his way further back and further back through the crowd until he came to our block right at the back. Emma next to me was trying to keep her cool as she waved to Calum. He made his way up the steps that we had come up to get to our seats.
"You two" Calum said pointing at me and Emma and beckoning.
"Em can I not?" I asked. I really, really didn’t want to.
"No Carla you have to you can’t say no, come on" she said tugging my hand and heading of in Calum's direction. Calum's face lit up as he took Emma’s hand I decided to follow behind. Wishing so badly I could return to my seat. This is the moment I had been dreading for a year, which I never wanted to come across in my whole, life and it was happening now. Now, in front of thousands of people. I closed my eyes taking in a deep breath of the humid heavy hair surrounding me before waking up the steps. As I reached the top Luke turned around, his gaze met mine and his mouth feel open. I can't do this not in front of this many people. I turned around to walk back down the step but the gate that had been open before was now closed. There was only one option. I ran off the stage and into the left wing. My heart was beating against my chest so heavy I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone in the arena could hear. I want to run and hid back stage but it was too dark and I didn’t know my way around so, I stood there, looking out into the vast crowd. I could see Beth, she was in the front row with her two friends we called her minions. They were laughing, probably at me.
"Hold on two seconds guys" Luke said handing Michael his guitar and walking towards me. Twisting and turning I looked for an escape but there seemed to be none; people surrounded me in every direction. "Carla?" Luke asked in a whisper. I looked down at my feet not responding. Next thing I know I was being pulled into the tightest hug ever. It was familiar, the way he hugged was still the same, his smell even though he was sweaty was still the same, the only thing that seemed to change was his height, and he had grown. "I’ve missed you" he said recoiling and placing both his hands on my face. I kept looking down at the floor I didn’t want to contact his baby blue eyes again because I knew it would bring a tidal wave to my own. "Please, can you come on stage with me and we'll get through this song and then I can explain". I didn’t want to make a scene, not now at least so I just nodded. His hand slipped into mine as he pulled me out on stage. It went silent; the whole arena was holding its breath and all eyes were on us. "Sorry about that guys. We have an amazing coincidence; this is Clara the girl I wrote this song about". What. He wrote a song about me. My heart fluttered as my jaw fell open. My hand slipped out of Luke's and my eyes finally looked up. His eyes meet mine and they smiled at me, not his lips but his eyes. The boys guitars had all been taken away and they were all standing on stage just them their chosen girl and a mic. I never new Luke thought about me, not after he left. I thought he hated me. Why would you write a song, let alone this one about someone that you hated. He never tried to contact me, not once. My mouth was still open and even though I didn’t need to speak I was speechless. His strong muscly arm grabbed my side pulling me towards him. "Don’t leave me" he whispered in my heart just before the music started. As he sung the memories of that day came flooding back. The confusion, the self loathing, the desire and all the hurt in the world. Tears stung the back of my eyes as i swallowed hard trying to control my emotions. I buried my face in Luke’s chest as hot tears burnt my skin. He pulled me away from his body looking into my eyes before all the boys finished of the song "she sleeps alone. My heart wants to come home. I wish I was, I wish I was..." they all sang together. There was a moment of silence before the crowd erupted screamed. Before Luke could pull me into a tight hug again I ran off stage this time not stopping because I didn’t know where I was going. why did I agree to this is was such a bad idea and now thousands of people had seen me cry on stage to Luke, Luke hemming and non, not a single person in that crowd would know why or even understand.
