Mine // Carl Gallagher

Chapter 20

"Sophia, I'm ready to talk." Sophia rubbed her eyes as she was just about to fall asleep and sat up on the couch, pulling a blanket onto her to stay warm. What did he need to talk about? She was really worried and afraid about what he would tell her, but she was ready to listen because she was tired of their "fight."
Carl sighed and sat down next to her on the couch, just staring ahead at the burning fireplace. Sophia let it be silent until he finally spoke, "I know there's been tension between us, I know that. Things haven't been normal and I can take the blame. I know that we made up last night before bed and I apologized, but today I was just pissed because you didn't say sorry back. You totally lost it on me and wouldn't let me even explain myself. Come on girl, you can't sit here and say that this whole thing is entirely my fault. I know that it's mostly my fault, but not all of it."
Sophia looked at him, she felt guilty that she didn't apologize too. Oh God, all she could think about was how selfish she must've seemed when she just took his apology and didn't return one since honestly a majority of their "problem" was because of her. She was embarrassed and flustered as she spoke quietly, "I'm so sorry, Carl, I really am. I know that a majority of all of this is because of me. I should've let you explain and I shouldn't have gotten so emotional over something so small... I really just want us to go back to normal."
He stared into her sad brown eyes sympathetically as he was leaned back against the couch, "It's okay. But, just know that it's not small to me if it isn't small to you. If this situation is really important to you and you still really want to talk about... us... then it's important to me too and I'll talk for as long as you want until we figure this out." Sophia slightly nodded in agreement, "Okay, I'd still really like to just figure this out because I just don't know what any of this means. Where do we stand? How do you... like... feel about me...? I'm sorry but I just feel so lost since you give me such mixed signals."
Carl continued to stare into the fireplace, the flames reflecting upon his blue eyes, as he slouched down farther into the couch and crossed his arms, "I don't know either. Sophia, I really do like you. It's just that I'm not used to having actual committed relationships and I'm not ready to have that kind of change. So yeah, I am... attracted to you I guess... but I can't deal with having a girlfriend. I'd like to stick to having side chicks and hook ups. But you'll always mean so much more to me than any girl I flirt or sleep with, I swear. I don't know where we stand or what we are, but we can't be- in a relationship. I hope you understand where I'm coming from."
Sophia stayed quiet because she had no idea on how to take that. Was this a bad or a good thing?? So he liked her back, which she liked, but he didn't want to date her, which she didn't like. She didn't know why he was all cuddly and flirty with her, but maybe that was just how he was with all of his girls. She understood that it had nothing to do with her and that he just wasn't looking for a legitimate girlfriend, but she still felt a little upset. She wouldn't let him see that though so she just pretended like she was okay with his answer. Sophia gave him a fake small smile as she laid back down on the couch and snuggled beneath a blanket with her head rested on a pillow then said, "Okay. I'm okay with that." He stood up from the couch and picked Sophia up bridal style, slightly surprising her, "You're not sleeping on that piece of shit couch tonight."
She couldn't help but smile, ignoring the fact that she's completely been friend zoned, and cuddled into his shoulder as he carried her up the stairs to their room. Sophia was so vulnerable and lonely at the time, that she was okay with being whatever she was to him. She knew that he was probably taking advantage of how head over heels she was for him, but in the moment she did not care one single bit. She knew that there was a good chance that he was lying when he said that she meant more to him than any other girl, but she didn't care. She was just glad that he liked her back. She was caught up in thought when he gently set her down on their bed and pulled the blankets on top of her, then he laid next to her. He lazily swung his arm on top of her torso as he moved closer to her. Sophia was so swoon, whipped, and head over heels, that she sleepily said, "I love you", without thinking. She had a small smile on her face as her eyes were closed and she was starting to fall asleep, but his eyes just flashed wide open when she said that and he could say nothing for a while. Sophia didn't dare to open her eyes because she was so embarrassed and felt awkward that she just said that. Carl could only smirk and lousily say, "I told you that you'd fall for me one day."

God, please save this girl from this boy that she loves too much.

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A/N: Sorry that I haven't updated in awhile, I've been so busy with high school & it's getting stressful. It sucks cause I LOVE writing this story but I barely have the energy to do anything but homework nowadays. Please forgive me, I would write forever if I could. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter! I know it's pretty short and might be a little confusing, but it's suppose to be confusing. They have a really complicated relationship, if you ask me. Also, I know that this storyline might be moving really slow? IDK I'm just afraid of moving things too fast but now I think I'm moving too slow, so I'll have to come up with something more juicy to come up next ;) Please tell me how you feel about this in the comments! I need feedback!! Thank you so much for reading, I'm going to go work on another chapter now :)

(Also pleaseee share this story with others or mention it cause I would love it if I could get more people to read it! It's something that I would really like more people to enjoy and know about, so if you know any fellow ethan/carl/shameless fans then please tell them about this story lol thank youuu)