The Nemesis Syndrome

44. Leo

Eliza pulled her wrist out of his grasp and Leo stared at her retreating back. Not because he felt pity for her, although he supposed that some part was sad for her, but because after all of this, after everything they had both been through, he finally realised that he might not see the Eliza he first met. Not after her time in the water coffin. She was broken, and trying not to show it.

But then, people couldn't be broken, not entirely. Fractured, yes. Cracked, yes. Chipped, yes. But broken? Broken like a glass vase that met the floor? No. No single piece of her was missing. No small fibre of glass or slight fragment was gone. She was still there, all of her, at least. Maybe not put together as a vase anymore. Maybe not the way Leo remembered her - hating him and knowing he had been so ready to kill her. Putting her life in danger, and leaving her in that place.

And a part of him mourned that. Not because he missed how she filled the silence, but because they both couldn't have the lives they wanted anymore. Because they were both messy consequences. They couldn't have those lives of love and family and happiness anymore. They couldn't have their happily ever after. He couldn't see his sister again. She couldn't have the life of love she wanted with her soulmate. Leo accepted that long ago, many years after he saw the same name on both his wrists.

So, he walked behind her, the bag heavy on his shoulders as he cast one last look around the place before closing the door, the thoughts of sleeping on a warm bed fading from his mind.

____________

Leo glanced off to the side, the houses had long since faded from his view, and with every step, drowsiness tugged at his mind.

"We should stop here," he finally spoke when they approached a gap in trees large enough for them both to settle down to sleep.

Eliza nodded, closing her eyes for a moment as she let the bag drop from her shoulders. A silence enveloped them as they got ready, broken only by the shuffle of their feet.

"You should eat," Leo nodded towards the bag once they both had settled down on the ground. It was uncomfortable but it was the best they were going to get.

"I'm not hungry." Eliza shook her head, tipping it back to rest it on the bark of the trunk behind her.

"You still need to eat," Leo pushed, taking a protein bar out of his bag and biting into it. It was dry and too chewy, but it was food he needed. "Just have half. Even if it's the chocolate."

Eliza grumbled under her breath, and the face she pulled didn't escape Leo's notice. But he felt a small victory when she reached into her bag, pulling out a small bar of chocolate.

"Stop feeling sorry for me." Eliza rolled her eyes when she caught Leo's gaze on her.

Leo raised an eyebrow, "I don't feel sorry for you. I feel sorry for both of us."

"What?" Eliza pulled a face.

"Look at us." Leo gestured to himself and her. "We're both... different."

Eliza huffed a sarcastic laugh, "I guess life pulled one over on the both of us."

Leo sighed, "Yeah, I guess it did."

"You haven't changed." Eliza spat bitterly, causing Leo to wince slightly from her tone, "I've just seen who you really are."

Leo laughed under his breath, a mocking and disbelieving one.

"Don't give me that," Eliza rolled her eyes, and Leo felt a burning under his skin, "You're still you. You're still nice. Still trusting and still trying to make it up to me. You still hope that we can have a better life."

Leo sat silently, keeping his eyes just past her head so he wasn't looking at her as she got riled up. "You still can fight. You still want to fight. You still feel sorry for me." She broke off, glancing away from him, "You're still so much stronger than me - I'm fucking tired, Leo! I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know what I'm doing, why I'm running, why I have any reason to run when everything I've ever known - everyone I've ever known ha -" she broke off, chest heaving as tears fell her eyes.

Leo blinked back the tears that stung his eyes, the urge to cry almost overwhelming him. Without a word, he crawled over to Eliza, simply sitting beside her as her shoulders shook and she buried her head into her hands.

The put in his stomach dragged him down, but as time past, he felt it grow lighter, and when Eliza's shoulders finally stopped shaking, he placed a gentle hand on her knee, offering what solace he could.

"I'm fighting because it's all I've ever known." He smiled sadly, "You're so much stronger than me. You've literally been to hell and back, you've survived so much worse than I have. You are so strong to still be here, so still be fighting with me. I wouldn't have been able to do that. You are so strong, 'Liza." Leo struggled to find words that conveyed his thoughts, "I don't want - I wish I was - I don't -"

"Stop talking, Leo."

Leo screwed his lips shut.

"Thanks."

Leo nodded, "Of course."