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ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴛʏ-ɴɪɴᴇ | ᴡɪᴅᴇ ᴀᴡᴀᴋᴇ

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴛʏ-ɴɪɴᴇ | ᴡɪᴅᴇ ᴀᴡᴀᴋᴇ

"ғɪɴɪsʜ ᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴇ ᴅᴏɴᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ɪᴛ. ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴅᴏɴᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ. sᴏᴍᴇ ʙʟᴜɴᴅᴇʀs ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʙsᴜʀᴅɪᴛɪᴇs ɴᴏ ᴅᴏᴜʙᴛ ᴄʀᴇᴘᴛ ɪɴ; ғᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴀs sᴏᴏɴ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ. ᴛᴏᴍᴏʀʀᴏᴡ ɪs ᴀ ɴᴇᴡ ᴅᴀʏ. ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴀʟʟ ʙᴇɢɪɴ ɪᴛ sᴇʀᴇɴᴇʟʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛᴏᴏ ʜɪɢʜ ᴀ sᴘɪʀɪᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴇɴᴄᴜᴍʙᴇʀᴇᴅ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏʟᴅ ɴᴏɴsᴇɴsᴇ." 

 ― ʀᴀʟᴘʜ ᴡᴀʟᴅᴏ ᴇᴍᴇʀsᴏɴ

They hadn't invited you to join them for breakfast again.

When you had been given the opportunity to state your issues and concerns, you thought you would be free to speak about whatever you wanted to. But you hadn't- not when there were some topics in particular that Ivan wasn't fond of having to speak on. When you had mentioned Alfred and what was to happen to him to the siblings, everything had gone wrong from there.

You felt as if the three of you were on good terms- at least enough so that you would be able to speak to them the way that you had. You didn't realize just how much of an effect it would have on Ivan and the rest of the family and staff that lived inside of the house- not until you saw how distant they had all become. It wasn't as if they were angry with you, but it didn't mean that their avoidance was doing much for your sour mood.

Hours had passed since the day you had been with them last- and then those hours had turned to days until it was weeks later. The vast majority of your free time had been spent locked away inside of your bedroom in silence. You didn't have the confidence to approach anyone to speak to them, and you weren't sure if wandering around would be the best option for you to choose so you stuck to yourself. 

You were glad that you had been given more books to read before the whole falling out had started. Katyusha had come to visit you weeks ago and in that time asked about the genres that you were interested in- she had picked up a few books for you while out on a trip in town, the same time that she had gotten you a few more clothing articles and the likes.

You had been happy to be able to fill up your bare bookshelf with the things that you had gotten and brought back with you from home. It definitely made your bedroom feel more personal than it had been when you first moved in. You had gradually begun filling up your bookshelf with novels you enjoyed and others areas of the room had been used to place different photos that you had taken from your home.

It felt better- more comfortable. It reminded you of the things that you had enjoyed back at home and everything you were accustomed to. The photos of your parents had been placed out your dresser- it was so you'd be able to catch a glimpse at them when you walked in and out of your room. A photo of Alfred had been set down on your nightstand so that you saw him whenever you woke up, and a photo of Matthew was on the bookshelf for the times you sought out a book for comfort.

It made everything more tolerable for you. It was bad enough that you had to sit in silence most of the time, but knowing that in some way a part of your friends and family were there with you when you needed them, it made you feel warm inside. But it could never compare to having them there with you physically. 

Things had gotten too quiet for you and everything seemed boring and repetitive for you, you were tired of reading books and just looking out of the window every day. You didn't get much of a glimpse of the workers either- they usually entered your room while you slept to leave your breakfast tray on the nightstand.