Torment ( not done )

Chapter 1 Holy Hell

* My POV * 

I can feel the crisp cold air whip across my face as I run faster . My feet are bare and slamming against the even colder hard ground . I can feel the dirt and fallen tree branches scraping the bottom of my feet . It hurts bad but I have to keep running . Running from him , Running from it all . My lungs burn as if they are on fire , I push harder . I finally reach where woods meet road . As my body collapses my knees hit the cement . I know they are tore up now from the pain that radiates through my body . I drag in air like it is the rarest of all elements . Over and over until the burning is a dull hurt but manageable . Trying to stand up I feel an unmistakable force in my back . I go to scream but I choke on my own blood rising in my throat . I feel the pressure released and redistributed just right of where it was before . For a second time I fall to my knees . I am desperately trying to breathe around the vile choking . I know I can't take it anymore . I know who's done this to me I don't need to see who it is . I put my head down an attempt to get the blood out of my way so I can breathe . I feel a large heavy force to my face knocking me on my back gasping and fumbling for air . I close my eyes as I fade out I hear a laugh I never will forget . I have heard it a thousand times before . He was my everything . He is my everything .  I sink farther and farther down into a darkness I can't explain .    

~ 1:26 am  

I hear myself scream as I lunge forward drenched in sweat . Reaching out for someone or something anything to hold on to . I gasp for air finally feeling the pain in my throat . While my eyes adjust I grab my chest in a vain attempt to slow my heart . This is the same dream I have had many times . You would think one would get it by now . I toss my covers off of me they are damp same as my bed . No doubt from all this sweat that keeps poring out of me . I throw my feet over the side of my bed . Its so high up I still have about half a foot drop . Everyone else is sleeping I decide that jumping isn't the best thing to do . I am not fat but I ain't no skinny mini either . I am 5"6 and 180 pounds most of it is in my big chest . My harsh cut bangs  are in my face as I slide my legs down the bed . I grab the towel I used earlier to wipe off my makeup . Taking my phone off the charger . Making my way to the bathroom . I try not to think . Think about the dream , Think about him . How even after he stabbed me his laugh made me feel safe and okay .    I turn on the light half expecting to see the boogie man or whatever . I walk in closing the door behind me . Sitting the towel on my vanity with my phone . I look into the mirror over the sink . Its bigger and that's where the light comes from . I sigh louder than necessary . My eyes are blood shot . Explains why they burn every time I blink . My dark circles makes it look someone punched me in my face , And they won . My face in general is lacking color and for a natural red head that's worse than being burnt . Speaking of my hair it is a mess but you can still see my bright red roots shining through . I need to redye my hair . Black and red roots look weird , I brush my teeth . I don't know why but I have this thing about brushing them . Weird I know but I am brushing them all the time . I pick up my phone putting my password in . I sigh again seeing I have two missed calls one voice mail and ten messages all from one person . This is what I get for not texting her all day . I decide to listen to the voice mail first .

Erika: " Look I understand your going through some shit . " She pauses ."  Some pretty nasty ugly boy infested shit . But turning off the world . AND YOUR BEST FRIEND isn't going to help just efficiently make it worse . I am here for you babe always am . Just text me or something so I know your alive . Love you bye. "  

I exit out of the voice mail I know his is up next I haven't had the courage to do that yet . I go to my messages .  

Erika: Ayeeee .  

Erika: Ginger bread you better answer me !  

I smile at her pet name for me . Usually its Crazy / Crazy ass Kyrsten . I earned and wear that title proudly . Grasshopper given to me by my mom hence why I call her OLD wise one. And the best of them all DooDoo . It was given to me by my sister we are only a year apart and when she was young she never spoke we had our own language . It kinda just stuck with me through the years . I continue to read .