Guns Of Eternity.

Asleep.

8 am
I woke up for studies, thinking that It was the last place where I wanted to be right now.
I looked through my window and once again, I saw the pale, smiling, reassuring face of the only one I ever cared about those last months.
It felt like home.
" Good Morning, love. " he said with a gentle voice.
" Good morning, beautiful prince of mine. " I sang with a little smile.
He laughed like a child.
We spent a couple of minutes talking about random things before he would turn around and look at the clock.
" Aren't you supposed to go study like the serious bright smart student that you are? "
" No. "
He stayed silent for a moment before a little smile would appear on his lips. He was well aware that when I had something in my mind even destiny wouldn't be able to change that.
" Then come by my side. " he finally said.

Like all these days since his announcement, I joined him in his room.
I proceeded to empty the ashtray and put back some vinyls to their place.
" Making order in the room is five minutes wasted instead spending it with me. " he said with a smile, but in a serious tone.
I dropped the vinyl i had in my hand and sat near him.
This morning felt strange for an unknown reason,and I was even more in love with him. His eyes seemed unbelievably prettier,his smile was taking my breath away and simultaneously bringing life back to me.
" What are you looking at? Do I have something on my face? " he said with a little laugh
" No. I.. " I couldn't continue my sentence . Instead, I just wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his chest.
" it's barely 8:30 and you're already crying. You better try and go back to sleep, love. "
" going back to sleep is a hour less to spend with you. "
He didn't say anything, surely aware that it was true anyway.
He lays on his back and Patted his bed so that I would join him.
We were side to side, him playing with my hair and me caressing his back.
My eyelides went heavier and heavier until I would fall in the abyss.

Maybe some minutes, maybe some hours passed before I would reopen my eyes difficulty.
A kiss on my forehead made me wake up entirely.
" what time is it? "
" exactly 9:03."
" why are you awake early by the way? "
" Headache. Also felt nauseous."
I sighed heavily. I always felt useless in these times.
All my hugs, all my sweet encouraging words, all my tears and all my kisses couldn't stop him from suffering.
Useless.
Once again, destiny showed me that I could act stubbornly as much as I wanted, I couldn't change it.

He moved a bit to reach a vinyl from The Heptones and played it.
♪My little honey says she's going to stay, now.
I asked her why, she replied she loves me dearly.
She's not gonna leave me, until her dying day, dying day. ♪
We were enjoying the music and laughing at the lyrics when things got complicated again.
I had my eyes closed and reached at his hand. The sensation I felt made me open them violently.
His arm as well as his body were shaking from fever and almost wet from sweat.
" Paul.. Do you take something for this kind of situations? "
Negative nodding.
As no one was at his house at the moment, I asked if I had to phone anyone.
Same answer as the first one.
" Cold bath. "
I approved and helped him walk to the bathroom and put off his clothes.
Now installed in the water, his shaking was beginning to diminish, as he began to slowly come back to life.
" Close your eyes. "
I pretexted to help him put on shampoo for stooping to his face's level and gently lend a kiss on his lips. He opened one eye, then the other before smiling and making it last longer.
We went back to his room.
Once again, I helped him with his clothes and we proceeded to eat something or at least try to, as the plates remained untouched.
The only thing that reached Paul's lips were cigarettes.
We were sitting on the ground, admiring the blue clear sky, his head on my shoulder and my arm around his waist.

" Do you know what is inside of you? "
"Rotten organs.. "
I tried to act like I didn't hear what Paul just said. After all, he was the sick one and I had to always be strong and support him until the very end.
"No..Stars dust, rainbows and.."
" Love." He added.