Separated

Chapter 4

Note: These next two chapters are the toughest so hang in there and don't hate me. =)

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"I thought that today we should discuss what happened. We've been meeting for over two months already and it's important that we talk about the problems you've encountered. So far, all I hear from the two of you is that you were very happy. That doesn't explain why you're separated now." The doctor opened during this session.

Maine started biting her lip and wringing the tissue she was holding. "Rj..."

He looked at her and touched his thumb to her forehead, smoothing away her frown. "Doc, baka naman we can defer until she's comfortable."

"No. We will never get anywhere if we keep postponing." The doctor gave in a little though, "But we can start with you Mr. Faulkerson, if you want."

Alden was still looking at Maine. "Okay, ako nalang muna, okay?" He then gave a quick glance to the doctor, nodding for her to proceed.

"Tell me about that night she left."

"I didn't know. The house was dark when I got home and I assumed she was either out with friends or had work. I didn't check my phone and I didn't look for her. I just went about my business and then slept." Alden seemed to be in pain with the memory.

"Then?"

"I got up around five the next morning. It was still dark out.... The porch light was still on."

"I'm sorry?" The doctor asked.

"The porch light. I would leave it on when she would come in late – Malabo kasi eyes niya so hirap siya when it's too dark. When she comes in, she'll turn it off na after she locks the doors... That day, I only felt something wrong when I saw the porch light still on."

He rubbed his neck. This was a memory he didn't want to recall - the feeling of foreboding when he saw the light on and realized that Maine had not come home. His initial sense of panic because he thought she might have figured in an accident and finally feeling like his heart was ripped out when he realized she left him on purpose.

"There was no note. Just a text from her to not look for her anymore because she needed to go."

"I'm sorry..." Maine whispered, crying openly. "I couldn't write anything. I've been wanting to run for awhile but everytime I would stop to write you, I couldn't go through with it. So, that last time, I didn't stop to write. I just packed my things and left."

"But, why? Hindi ko maintindihan eh."

"You changed, Rj. You were rarely home and you barely looked at me when you were there. Padami na naman ng padami yung work mo just to avoid being home with me. People have always told me I don't deserve you and I started to believe them, especially since kasalanan ko why you were avoiding me."

Maine was silent and Alden didn't know what to do.

"I'm sorry, Rj. I'm sorry I lost our baby."