Middle of a Memory

Chapter 13

"Are you sure Cole's ok with us being here?" Lacey asked nervously as she glanced around the courthouse.

"I didn't exactly tell him we were coming here." Delilah admitted.

"What?" Lacey paled.

"Look, Cole is over protective and if I had told him I wanted to come down here he would have insisted I bring Luke or Caroline. And I needed to do this. You're my closest friend, Lace... I promise to tell him when we get back to Nashville."

"Ummm. You aren't gonna have to wait that long...."

"What?" Delilah looked up from her phone. "What are you talkin about?"

"Cole's here..." Lacey whispered.

Delilah's head snapped towards the direction Lacey was looking. And sure enough her husband was headed her direction with Joel hot on his heels.

She swallowed hard. He looked furious. She had never seen him look so angry.

"Hi, babe." She said weakly as he approached her.

"Don't you hi babe me, Delilah Marie.  What the hell are you doin here?" Cole snapped.

"I uh...I needed..."

"Don't even think about lying to me either. The detective left a message confirming your appointment. Seriously, Lils... what in the hell are you thinkin?" Cole sighed.

"I'm thinkin that I need to do this, Cole."

"Why?"

"Because I need to see his body. I need to see him for myself." She stood up and tugged him away from Joel and Lacey. "I need this, Cole. Try to understand, please...." She tugged his crossed arms down off his chest.

"Baby, believe me, I am trying to understand what possessed you to do this."

"I have to, Cole. I just have to." Tears filled her eyes. "I have to see it to believe it's actually over."

Cole felt his heart tighten at the sight of her tears. He nodded. "Ok." He pulled her into his arms. "Ok. I get it. But you should have told me."

She buried her face in his chest as he held her tight. "Thank you. And I'm sorry. I should have told you. But sometimes it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission."

"Like you've ever asked for permission." She felt him laugh. "You're lucky you're beautiful and I love you." He kissed the top of her head.

"I love you too."

"Delilah?" A tall blond stepped out of an office.

"That's me." She wiped her eyes.

"Come with me."

Delilah looked at Cole and squeezed his hand. "Be back in a few."

They walked in silence down to the morgue. "His parents will be picking up his body in a few hours. They don't know about this..."

"They don't need to." She assured him. "I just need to see it for myself."

"This way." He pushed open a door. It was cold in the room and she shivered despite having on long sleeves. The corner was standing beside a steel table with  a sheet laid over a body. "Are you ready?"

"Yes." She nodded. She wrapped her arms around herself for warmth. The sheet was pulled back and Delilah swallowed. Ryan was really gone. He didn't look so scary to her laying on the table. His skin was bluish and she could make out the stab wounds. She stared at the face that put her through so much pain and fear for years for a few moments. She nodded. "Ok. I'm done.Bye. Ryan. I hope you find peace where ever you are." She said as they put the sheet back over him.

Cole was waiting alone in the lobby when she came out. She took one look at her husband and burst into tears. "I've got you." He whispered as he gathered her in his arms. "I'm here."

"It's really over, Cole. He's gone. It's done."

"I sent Lacey and Joel back to Nashville in your car. I thought we'd spend the night. Have dinner." He wiped her eyes and handed her the purse Lacey had given to him before they left.

"I'd like that." She forced a smile. "I'd really like that."

"Come on, gorgeous. Let's go find us a room and some food."

Two weeks later Cole came in smiling. "What?" She looked up from her laptop.

"Tour is over in a week...." He pulled her to her feet. "How about we get outta town for a few days?"

"And go where?"

"Anywhere you want. You chose." He kissed her hair.

"New York?"

"You wanna go to New York?"

"Yes. Let's go sight see. Be tourist for once."

"Done. I'll have Kerri make the arrangements."

"Are you hungry?"

"Yes."

They landed in New York two days after the tour ended. She wanted to see everything. He indulged her every whelm. They took in a show, went to Time Square and a carriage ride around Central Park. The day before they were to go home she looked at the calendar. She felt off. Like something wasn't right. Cole was getting in a work out in the hotel gym. Her face paled when she realized she hadn't started her period. She quickly put on her coat and ran down to the closest drug store. She paced the bedroom waiting for the test to turn. "Please please." She sent up a silent prayer. They hadn't been trying. But they weren't trying to prevent it either. After the miscarriage they decided to take a year off the drugs and shots to see if it happen on it's on. If it didn't they were going to try IVF in the New Year.