Between Us

Those Dark Days

I'm almost there.

I just have to run faster, that's it. I pump my arms harder and demand my legs to move faster, quicker. I can see it, the house. If I could only run faster! I can see how fast I pass the houses and buildings around me and it still isn't fast enough.

I'm running out of breath, this isn't good. I look back over my shoulder and a sob escapes my lips. I can't see him behind me anymore and all I can think of is I might have lost him again. If only.

"Holy shit!" I gasp as I finally reach the house. I put my arms over my head trying to catch my breath.

8:17.

"That's not bad you know." Davis says, "it's actually pretty damn good."

"Yeah well running a mile in 8:17 minutes is not going to win me the gold."

"Look, you're stressing this out. Your one of our best runners Emma, you're going to win this thing. Sometimes you need to have some serious faith in yourself." That's Davis for you, always trying to lecture me some way or another. "We've been coming out here everyday at five in the morning, training for a month. You've got this."

"It's only been three weeks Dav."

"Yeah well it feels alot longer I'll tell you that. Now come on, I'm getting ready at you're house this time."

Davis was one of my two best friends, my other being Evianna. He was two years older than me and Evi, but never looked down on us. I remember I used to have a crush on him once upon a time in the 6th grade. Then one day he finally acknowledged me and in that moment I realized, he wasn't for me. Not because he was a jerk, or an ass. Just because he was so damn nice and easy to talk to, he was that person you'd want in your life.

People always stereotyped him because he was light skinned and played football they expected him to be a typical jock. Which believe me he was and could be, but only his true friends knew how much of a geek and nerd he was. The kid knew his action figures and PC games. It's hard to believe that behind all of the boy next door charm and undeniably great brown wavy hair, there was such a person who could get into a giant debate between Marvel and DC Comics.

"I'm gonna borrow one of your towels," he informed me as soon as we entered my room.

"Do what ever you want."

"Remind me, how many times have I told you how much I love that you have your own bathroom in your bedroom?"

"Benefits of being an only child. Now go shower, I still have to drop you off at work."

Mornings like this, where Davis got ready at my house, I would drop him off at work at Starbucks and I would go to my first class. His parents helped him out as much as they could with college but he still had to pay for his own books and personal needs, hint why he has a job. Me on the other hand, benefits of being an only child my parents pour their money on me. For that I'm grateful, they want me to focus on school, no distractions and I agree.

I go over to my dresser and grab clothes to hop in the shower down the hall.

There I am, that's my reflection right there. I don't have self esteem issues, I know I'm not ugly, but I'm not gorgeous either. I know the truth about myself and that's good enough for me. But I can't help to think back to a couple of years ago, when I was 17.

Those dark days.

***

We're okay, we really are. It all just takes time, I know that. I really do, don't I? Don't I know that this happens to everyone. We all go through this right? I know we do. He says we do.