Jeremy #Wattys2016

Chapter 3

The life we live may not be the one we'd choose for ourselves, but the one chosen for us. Along the path that is your life, you'll meet people who can change it in the simplest yet greatest of ways, all while underestimating their impact.

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Jeremy

I existed in a moment of misery. The cycle of built up hopes and subsequent anguish caused by disappointment, became a nuisance to me. I didn't want to be made the same empty promises of a salvation by anyone else. I cried incessantly, knowing that there was love still held captive in my heart not only for my son, but for him. But I needed to end it. My life is one that I know would head to nowhere, so why prolong this pain? Why should I prolong the wait of those who'd rather celebrate my death? This ends now.

My head and chest thumped thunderously as I reached for the bottle of pain pills in the medicine cabinet. I began to fill my head with happy thoughts of a new life with him, my kid and myself. I knew that he'd be hurt to know that I'd left this world but I hope that he thinks ahead to what we can have in the next.
I removed the cover from the bottle and took a handful of capsules into my grasp. In that moment, my mind flashed to him dancing to one of his favorite songs. Hopefully the lyrics would comfort him like I wish I could.

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My love, leave yourself behind, beat inside me, leave you blind. My love, you have found peace. You were searching for relief. - Sia "My Love"

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My head was cocked back as I sat on the toilet, counting down from ten the seconds until I was to be freed. My heartbeat slowly began to fade into the next world as my hands were brought quickly to my mouth. I swallowed...

Xavion

Him breaking up with me left me without a heart. He had long taken claim of it, with our love the only thing keeping me alive. I couldn't let that be it, my spirit couldn't be divorced from my soul mate over something so trivial. I had to speak to him. I needed something valid to rip me apart, not fear. I quickly gathered myself, my emotions and all my strength before setting off to his house. I didn't care what anyone had to say; his mom, his brothers or even Jeremy himself couldn't change the way my mind was set. I was not ready to let go.

When I got to his house, I didn't even sneak in through his window as was custom. I wanted my presence to be seen, to be felt and that rage and resentment I had for those secret murderers to be released. But again, that great orchestrator didn't allow them to cross paths with my wrath. The house was as empty as the hearts of those people claiming to be his family. One thing was strange though, my body kept leading me towards the bathroom door as if his being was my magnet.

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"Jeremy, where are you? We need to talk this out! I am nowhere near ready to let go of this! Jeremy?..."

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The scene that confronted me as I cracked the bathroom door, is like a stain that you can't wipe clean. Seeing my soldier laying limp on the floor was one the most traumatic events I've experienced in my life. Immediately I called the ambulance before dropping to my knees to check for our pulse and luckily, life was still within him. I recall him slowly but broadly opening his eyes when he noticed that I was by his side. It seemed as if he thought my words were empty but I'm sure he knows now that I'm not going to let him down. The tears fell down my face and even though he was on the verge of death, he still wouldn't let me cry. That was something that he just couldn't stomach; to know that I was hurt.

Jeremy

Is he an angel? How could he have known that I was here; that I was leaving this world for good?

As I faded in an out of consciousness, it hit me; what if my dreams were indeed premonitions of what my reality could be with him? I began to see the light shining in the distance but here lies my chance to take a risk, to take that leap of faith, and then and there, I bravely decided to turn away from it. But, did I wait too long? The ambulance siren was the last thing I heard before everything went blank. Wake up Jeremy, wake up...

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"He's awake! You may go in and see him now..."

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I awoke to the monotonous beeping of the monitor near my bed in the stillness of the evening sunset. I distinctly remember how sick I felt when I got up. I believe that most of what I was feeling wasn't as result of what I'd done, but knowing that I had hurt him and my son.

Not too long after I awoke, I heard the door gently open and the pitter patter of my son's feet, followed by his. At the sight of his face, I couldn't hold back my guilt anymore. My brokenness started the chain reaction of tears among my boys. I know that right now I am so low and broken, but I know that this feels right; this is pure love...

Hi guys, I hope you are enjoying this book so far. This chapter was really dificult for me to complete and had me in tears most of the time but, I was able to pull through for you guys. I will be releasing 2 chapters of Island boy soon so also look out for that. Please don't forget to VOTE, COMMENT, SHARE AND FOLLOW! ♥ Xavier