All I Want Is You

Getting To Know Me

Taylor

(2 years later)

You know that feeling you get after you spent the whole of the previous evening drinking alcohol to the excess, life becomes a blur and distant memory.

Then the next morning or early afternoon usually, you try and wake up to return to the land of the living, with a head that's pounding as though your brain is trying to exit through your forehead and eye sockets, you ache from head to toe, with no recollection of why.

There are smiling faces all around you knowing what has happened to you, but you don't have a clue, there's no memory of the night before.

Well hi, you know exactly how I'm feeling right now but only ten times worse, my name I believe is Taylor, I only know this from the fact as my body was gently shaking someone was whispered that name in my ear, causing my brain to try and leave rather than face reality.

The shaking ceased immediately I tried to tell them to stop, but my mouth was so dry and wasn't operating correctly so I just mumbled incoherently.

Forcing an eye open that took quite a while, as it felt as though my eyelids were glued together and when I eventually endured the pain in forcing them apart, I had to immediately snap it shut again because of the brightness that assaulted my eye and the stark whiteness that surrounding my vision.

There was a sudden swishing noise and the room darkened considerably, enabling my eye to stay open and adjust, I then proceeded to do the same with my other eye.

At last I could see, what exactly I'm not sure, I tried to move my hand to scratch my nose but it was held down by someone else's hand.

"Steady Miss Deveroeux, you need to take things steady, get use to everything first, okay?"

I tried to nod my head, but it hurt so much, I stopped, again the steadying hand and calming voice.

"Good, just communicate with your eye's, one blink yes, two for no okay?"

I blinked the once.

"Good, now I know you have many questions that need answering, but they will have to wait, firstly we need to get you feeling better, then we need to assess you, before we start rebuilding, okay?"

One blink.

"That's good now nurse Livingston will take over and get you cleaned, fed and watered, I know you are dying to know what's happened but please, listen to what I have said, the time will come, but that's for the future not now okay"

One more blink.

"Good, nurse she's all yours" and with that, there was a lot of shuffling and a group of people I hadn't realised were in the room, all got up and left, the last person a middle aged woman, stopped with her hand on the door handle turned her head and smiled at me.

"It's great to have you back daughter" brushing aside a tear that trickled down her cheek with the back of her hand, before pulling the door closed behind her.

"Right young lady" the elderly nurse said pulling back my bed covers.

"Let's get you feeling human again shall we"

After what seemed an eternity, I had been washed, fed, watered and give tablet's all with out leaving the confines of the bed, as the nurse explained to me that in my condition, getting up and about will take a few days if not a week.

As I finished taking my array of different medicine's there was a knock on the door and the man who had done all the talking earlier stepped in with a younger blonde haired lady also in a white coat.

"Good" that seemed to be his favourite word when talking to me, good or okay, still he was nice about it.

"Taylor I am Doctor Hicks and I will be overseeing your recovery and assessing your progress over the next month or so, this is Doctor Talbot, who will be helping you remember and deal with your emotions, so you can return to a normal life"

As I made to speak, Doctor Hicks raised his hand.

"I know but now is not the time, give it a few days for you to recover and understand more then we will deal with your questions okay"

See what I mean, I blinked again, I don't know yet whether I was able to speak as my mouth seemed to be so dry even after having copious drinks, it didn't help.

During my time having a bed bath and filling my hungry belly, my eyes roamed around the room, I noticed I had a tube in my arm and there had been one up my nose, but that had since been removed by the nurse, pads on my chest and my forehead were hooked up to monitors that beeped with a regular consistency.

The room was definitely a hospital room and I was kept in my bed with large metal barriers on each side, one large window to my right now covered with an ill fitting blind that let in as much light as it blocked out.

Two ancient wing back chairs were placed either side of my head and the nurse occupied one now as she prepared my cocktail of drugs.

During the quiet spell after the two Doctors left, I tried to make sense of the whole situation, why was I in hospital, had I been in an accident of some sort, why can't I remember things.

I knew who I was now as it just suddenly appeared in my mind, almost like hey! I'm Taylor Deveroeux and that lady who was crying was my mum, but other things didn't materialise and I was finding it very frustrating, so much so I could feel my anger escalating as I clenched and unclenched my fists continuously.

"Hey! Miss Deveroeux calm yourself, trying to force a memory to appear won't work, it takes time, sometimes it can take months even years, other memories may never come back"

It was Doctor Talbot who had marched in the room, while I was preoccupied trying to remember.

"There is also what we call a trigger point it could be a certain event or someone will say something and that will trigger your subconscious and a whole host of memories will come flooding back, that is when you need to contact me and I will help you through the traumatic effects this can cause"

"But for now rest and recuperation are the orders of the day, then we'll see how you feel tomorrow and try and answer some of your questions"

I attempted a nod put couldn't quite pull it off as there was an excruciating pain in the back of my head, so I blinked once, I decided to try and see if my speech had returned later when I was on my own, because at present my mouth still refused to cooperate with my brain or my wishes.

I'm not a bad girl as far as I know, but I couldn't help but try and remember, hell who wouldn't, the more I struggled the more angry and upset I got, nothing, how in god's name could I not remember anything how is that possible.

This is worse than the morning after the night before where you had been blind drunk, at least it's only one night you have no recollection of, not your whole goddamn life.

I wondered if this was it, my life starts now! Shit could things get any worse.

Me and my big mouth, because they sure as hell can and boy! They certainly did.