Journey to the Center of Mikey's Mind - Alternate Story

The Pizza Panic

A heavy clonk reverberated around the space as the three turtle brothers' shells hit the firm ground. They each would have yelled in surprise if there were any air left in their lungs. Instead they gasped and sputtered and coughed as they drew deep breaths in one after the other.

"Ok team?" Leo croaked. He let his head fall over to his right, seeing Raph and Donnie sprawled out on the ground just as he was. Raph grunted his affirmation while Donnie lifted a hand, giving Leo a rather weary thumbs-up.

Once again the ninjas were surrounded by the contorting onyx mist that filled Mikey's mind-scape. They hauled themselves to their feet.

"Great, so much for Donnie's "fake Mikey will lead us to the real Mikey" plan." 

"Hold on a sec Raph," said Donnie distractedly as he felt a light breeze brush his bare shoulder, "I don't think we're done yet..."

"What do you -" began Leo, but he stopped, realizing that the light breeze was gradually becoming stronger and more powerful. They braced themselves against the gale as colour started to light up the simple landscape. Before long the brothers recognised their old home taking shape. They could make out the shadows of their dopplegangers from behind the thin Shoji screen and hear the sound of their sparring from within the dojo.

The turtles heard the tumbling clicks of the turnstiles as Mikey slid past and into the lair. He was carrying a pizza box and arguing with himself about whether he should eat the food inside or not.

"Must eat!" he whined hungrily, then stopped himself. "No! The guys will kill me!" he fretted. He gingerly put the box on the floor and then called for his brothers to come quick, knowing that he wouldn't be able to resist the greasy, cheesy charms of the meal forever. That was when the pizza started talking.

"Eat Me!" it moaned. The three brothers did a double-take.

"I'm sorry but did that pizza just talk?!" blurted Raph in disbelief, yet past-Mikey didn't seem to be as shocked by the voice. He turned his back on the pizza and stood hunched and rigid, as if he relaxed for just a moment his body would involuntarily lunge for the food.

"No way. The guys will be ticked." The box lid flapped as the phrase "eat me" repeatedly spilled from between the cardboard lips. Mikey remarked that even his imagination was hungry but then seemed to finally understand the oddness of the situation, turning around and picking up the box suspiciously. He lifted the lid promptly and was startled when the delicious meal inside started screeching at him. It leapt onto the young turtle's face and clung there as Mikey rolled onto the floor and screamed at it to "Get off of me!".

This was more than the three older turtles could handle.

"What in shell's name is going on!" yelled Raph. They watched their little brother wrestle the fast-food, their brows creased with befuddlement and their mouths hanging open. Mikey pulled a nunchuck out and bellowed stoically at the pizza:

"I never thought I'd say this to any pizza, but I will not eat you!" 

The fight continued a while longer, Mikey and his mouthwatering opponent facing-off in every corner of the lair, all the while the real Leo, Donnie and Raph watched on, utterly speechless. Mikey was tussling with the pizza on the floor when his three older brothers walked in nonchalantly. He begged them for help but they just stared at him, unamused.

"Wait, I remember this..." murmured the real Donnie. Mikey was yelling about the pizza being evil, but his brothers obviously weren't taking him seriously. After all, it's hard to take someone seriously when they're covered in sauce and pizza toppings.

"Another stupid excuse to eat all our food."

"Thanks for ruining dinner again, Mikey." The three turtles walked away, leaving Mikey alone with the treacherous supper. He shouted defiantly after them: