cake oneshots || book two

It Started Out With A Kiss (E)

Credit: neiria

It's 1:30am and I'm eating cinnamon bread what are you doin?

Calum's sass is what I love for and let me FIGHT THE BITCH WHO SAID THAT TO HIM ILL KILL YOU

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Luke honestly could not remember a time when he didn't have feelings for Calum. They had snuck up on him so quickly and before he knew it all his thoughts revolved around him when he wasn't preoccupied or trying his best to distract himself. He hated himself for feeling this way about his best friend, it was beyond inappropriate and could only end in heartbreak. He was positive there was no way in hell Calum felt anything other than friendship towards him and even if by some miracle he did, they still couldn't do anything about it. It was too risky and he knew neither of them would ever want to put the band's cohesiveness in jeopardy over something like this.

He had tried to stop feeling this way, to forget about all the things that Calum did that had made him fall for him. The way his face lit up when he saw Luke walk into the room. The way he laughed at all of his lame jokes even when they weren't very funny. The way he looked at him with such intensity in his eyes while they were on stage. The way he always knew what to say to cheer Luke up and even more than that, that he always knew when something was wrong without Luke even having to say anything. The way he carried himself, how perfect he looked with a smile on his face, how easy and natural everything felt when they were together, the list was endless. He had tried so hard to forget but he had failed miserably. He hid it well most of the time, doing his best to shield both him and his best friend from the repercussions of his deepest, darkest secret. Sometimes he felt like he was being obvious though, when he laughed a little too loudly, smiled way too widely when he saw Calum first thing in the morning, the way his eyes lingered for a little too long every time Calum removed his shirt or walked around half – and sometimes fully - naked. He thanked his lucky stars every single day that no one had caught on yet.

It was hard to be hopelessly in love with someone who didn't have the slightest idea. It was even harder to have to spend almost every waking moment with the man you were pining over. He was certain Calum had no clue at all because he knew if he did he might be a little more tactful to help spare Luke's feelings. There was no way he knew that every time he got close to him, Luke's stomach was filled with butterflies and that every touch was almost too much for him to handle. It couldn't be possible that Calum knew every flirtatious comment he made towards his best friend felt like a punch to the face and that when he talked about the girls he had met or hooked up with that it was like a triple kick to the face, gut and balls all at once. He wouldn't be aware of the internal struggle Luke was constantly being faced with and the many times he had almost given in and blurted out everything he felt. He had actually tried to once when he had been drinking way too much, he had gotten all serious with Calum and told him that he loved him but Calum misunderstood and said he loved him back, smiling and offering to get Luke some water. He had lost his nerve and couldn't bring himself to explain he didn't mean just as friends.

When he had first realized he felt something serious for Calum he tried his best to deny it, telling himself that he was just getting confused because they were such close friends. He had never had feelings for a dude before and it freaked him out beyond belief, even more so that they happened to be for his best friend and bandmate. It had taken him months to come to terms with it and accept that he did, in fact, want another guy in every single way possible. It wasn't just some little crush, he wanted to be with him, he wanted to spend all his time with him, he wanted to touch him in ways that made his cheeks redden when he thought about them. In recent times it had become so hard for Luke to spend time around Calum that he had been going out of his way to avoid him whenever possible. He wasn't sure if it helped anything, being away from him was possibly even harder for Luke than being around him was. He was so sure that any minute he would find his balls and tell him everything only to face the rejection that scared him more than anything and he couldn't handle that. He couldn't risk losing his best friend and he couldn't risk fucking up the band.