Confessions of a Brokenhearted [ON-GOING]

Self-pity

"Lexie, sort out those yearbooks in the attic." Lexie's mom-- Maryse shouted. Why do we have to move out of this house, is it because of Renz? She thought. On the way to the attic, she was still in pain with what had happen between her and Renz.

She picked one of her albums and noticed a straighted haired guy much taller than the girl beside him. The guy smiled at the camera while the girl was looking at the guy. Lexie smiled, that's her and Renz. They were bestfriends since they were kids.

She continued flipping through the pages. She saw her image with lots of cake icings on her face while Renz was beside her laughing. A tear escaped from her eye, she remembered Renz.

While flipping through the pages she saw herself in a Princess costume with her lovely tiara and Renz beside her with his Prince outfit. They were cute together she thought. If only she could go back in time and be with Renz.

They say Nice Guys Finish Last, is it also true with girls? Like, Nice Girls Finish Last because that's what happened to her. Because of being a nice girl, she finished last. Becaus of being a nice girl, Renz hadn't noticed her.

"Fuck being nice! Fuck acting like a woman! Fuck you Renz! Fuck you Pauline! Fuck All Of You!" she shouted while ruining the albums, tearing the pages apart.

Renz was her first love. Renz taught him the word love. They say without Love our earth is tomb. NO, that's not true. Love makes the world bitter. Love makes the world dry and dead. Love is not an antidote or drug. Love is a poison, which she drank when she saw Renz. Oh fuck, I should get over him, but I can't she thought.

"Lexie, are you okay?" her Mom asked.

"Yeah mom, but why do we need to move house. I'm good here." Lexie explained.

"We've talked about this. This house reminds you of your childhood friend." Her mom replied sternly.

"Renz? Yeah, Renz is one of the reasons why can't I leave this house. This house was the witness of our friendship." Lexie replied escaping a sob.

"Honey, it's okay. Cry it out." Her mom said. "I'm gonna leave you here. I need to watch the movers pack our things in their truck, okay? Don't do something, kay?" Her mom added reassuringly. Lexie nodded.

It's a sunny day outside, a beautiful weather for a walk. When her mom was gone, she looked at the window at the attic, it's high she thought. But still, she jumped. Good thing her bones were still there. But she had a big scratch on her beautiful leg. I don't care, Renz wouldn't notice this or me anyway! She thought and fought back a sob.

She thought it is a good and sunny day for a walk in the park. The park that used to be their favorite place as kids. She sat on the swing reminscing their moments together, laughing, playing tag, screaming, practicing hip-hop dances here but all of it shattered when people entered the scene.

On the corner of her eye, she saw a girl and a guy. Friends? Lovers? She didn't bother. They were laughing and talking like there's no time to spare. Maybe one of them has a cancer and they're spending their time together in their last minute. Good for them, she thought. Love is bitter!

"Hey miss, we can't help but notice you looking furiously at us. Why?" Lexie hadn't noticed that the two Lovers were beside her now.

"Oh no, nothing. Do you have a cancer?" Lexie asked pointing at the guy.

"No, and Sirena also doesn't have one. Why'd you ask?" the guy replied.

"The way you talked, the way you laughed. Why do you spend time with each other so much." Lexie explained with curiosity.

"Honey, haven't you forgot the meaning of love? Love is the reason why we spend so much time together." the girl replied. Lexie didn't bother to argue. The couple continued strolling the park. She continued strolling and passed by the lake of their park. She noticed her reflection in the water. She looked really old since that incident. She wished she could just die and vanish. No one loves her! No one cares!