Even If You Cross My Mind » CAMREN

Chapter 5 - Fix You

[Lauren POV]

Just when I would start to get used to a city, we hightailed out and landed in a new one. That was the nature of my life - not getting too comfortable, familiar, or attached. Autumn was upon us and the change of the season had me feeling nostalgic. We were in Manhattan this week for our "I'm In Love With a Monster" video premiere in Times Square; we were also in and out of the publicity circuit for Hotel Transylvania 2 and our upcoming East Coast tour dates. It was get up and go for the better part of eighteen months, and the past several weeks were the most exhausting (and dramatic) of the year, if not my life.

I was beyond grateful for all the success we'd experienced with our Reflection album, our tour, and our single 'Worth It' - but all five of us were tapped-out of energy. I know I was. It had been several weeks since Camila and I had our angry blow-out (that quickly escalated into angry sex) and I tried my best to remain aloof, cool, and detached as to not further complicate the situation that had already gone to hell.

We had a decent-sized break in the day between radio show interviews, so I decided to go explore solo and walk along the Hudson River waterfront. We all parted separate ways and would reconvene later. I just needed to be Lauren for a little while. I loved my girls, I loved my job, and I was happy to meet so many new, awesome people. But I needed a breather.

I needed to just escape and not be Lauren from Fifth Harmony, Lauren the friend, Lauren the client, or Lauren the cryptic, sexually confused celebrity. I craved to go unrecognized. I wanted to be just another face in the crowd - even if just for an hour or two. And what better place to be than New York? I found myself a nice waterfront bench in a quiet grassy area. The city looked unreal from this vantage point.

"Hey," I heard a voice from behind and saw Camila walking over to join me on the bench. She was wearing a white bomber jacket with a white fur hood, black leggings, and some black boots. She was always clad in youthful, vibrant colors but I always found her beauty to be most striking in neutral tones. I loved the earthiness about her features - the midnight doe eyes, the fresh olive complexion, her long, thick chocolate brown hair - that highlighted the maturity in her beauty.

"Hey," I responded with a friendly smile, then casually directed my attention back out to the water. I caught her in my peripheral vision handing me something.

"Brought you some Starbucks." she said warmly, holding out the medium-sized white cup. I took it from her hesitantly, surprised by her free-willed kindness.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah! Vanilla spice latte, right?" she beamed, taking a sip of her own hot coffee. I returned her smile and gave her a nod to show my gratitude.

"Wow, that's amazing - thank you."

"Of course. You know... Peace offering.," she said matter-of-factly. My petite bandmate sat opposite me on the bench looking out at the water, and I turned my head towards her inquisitively.

"Peace offering...?"

"Yeah," she shrugged and took a sip of her hot coffee, pursing her lips.

"Huh. Wasn't aware of the war." I smirked and took a sip of my latte, "Thanks, Camz."

The hot beverage was exactly what I needed on a day like today. It wasn't freezing by any means, but the air was frigid and damp - and in New York, the wind could grow hauntingly cold out by the water in Autumn.

"Does this mean you'll stop ignoring me?" I heard her shyly, but sweetly interject in a low-pitch tone. Hearing her say that broke my heart. Looking over at her and connecting our gaze, I saw so much hurt in her eyes.