calum never meant to hurt luke. he didn't expect luke to take this so personally. it wasn't his fault that he was falling for the boy with hair that seemed to change as often as his moods. he never expected things to get so bad between them. luke was always the one that he could find solace in but now it almost appeared that luke would be happier without him in his life at all. no matter whatever the fuck was on calum's mind, luke would always help him find clarity. now that luke is on the other side, he feels alone.
he often finds himself wondering if all of this is worth it. is a boy worth the possibility of losing the person that has always defended him, always reminded him he wasn't horrible, always reminded him of how loved he was? then he sees the emerald eyes and he's frozen all over again because god he's so beautiful on the inside and out and calum has never felt this way about anyone before. it killed him that he wasn't able to introduce him to luke as his boyfriend because this was something he wanted to share with luke. he always imagined coming home from a night out with possibly the love of his life and gushing to luke about the events of the night. it was stripped away from him because of luke's similar feelings for the boy. he won't let this boy be stripped away from him too.
when he sees luke leave the apartment to go out with him he can't help but be filled with helplessness. what had he done to be tortured in such a way? why couldn't he have his best friend and boyfriend be in the same room as him without being filled with awkwardness? why couldn't he have them both in his life? calum knows that if the boy feels the same way and they end up spending the rest of their lives together that he'll lose luke.
luke certainly won't be the best man at his wedding.
luke won't be the first person he tells when they decide to adopt.
luke won't be there for the housewarming party.
luke won't be there, ever.
why can't he have them both in his life without losing the other?
YOU ARE READING
everything | cake
Fanfiction"i want this relationship to be my everything. and maybe you just want it to be... one of your things." or the one where calum and luke fell in love in the wrong place at the wrong time. lowercase intended. (duh)
