Me: Rip
Friend: That's not funny, the dog just died in the movie the class just watched *trying not to cry*
Me: Oh sorry, rip my life
Friend: Whyyyyy
Me: Oh my god im sorry
Friend: I'm triggered
Me: What? Are you serious?
Friend: Probably
Me: That's not even a legit reason to become triggered, the dog wasn't even a part of our lives-
Friend: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT
Me: ITS A DANG MOVIE NOT YOUR CLOSE RELATIVE
Friend: You wouldn't react that way if your cat died-
Me: WHOA WHOA WHOA DO NOT BRING MY ANGEL KITTY INTO THIS CONVERSATION
Friend: YOU STARTED IT
Me: LEAVE ME ALONE, NOW IM TRIGGERED
Friend: WE'RE ALL TRIGGERED
Teacher: *stares at us while we yell about why we're triggered*
Me: HISSSS GO AWAYYY
Friend: WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE
Me: SINCE WHEN DO I MAKE SENSE
Friend: True... like your grandma doesn't make sense
Me: OH MY GOD I'M LEGIT POURING MYSELF A GLASS OF BLEACH AFTER THIS CLASS
Friend: THE DOG IN THE MOVIE DIED BECAUSE OF BLEACH FRICK YOU
Me: HISSSSSSSSSSS
Friend: RAWRRRRR
Teacher: Holy Jesus these people are crazy...
Me: REMEMBER THAT TIME A DOG THAT LOOKED EXACTLY LIKE THE ONE IN THE MOVIE PULLED ME INTO THE SIDEWALK WHEN I WAS SIX AND MY NOSE STARTED BLEEDING AND IT LOOKED LIKE A MURDER SCENE. YEAH. I'M TRIGGERED AF.
Friend: Oh yeah I almost forgot about that... you're still butthurt?
Me: Don't talk to me *runs away and hides under plastic chair*
Student: Oh my gosh this was better then the freaking movie
YOU ARE READING
A Fangirl's Guide: How NOT To Survive School
De TodoI mean, if you WANT a detention you can go ahead and say half the things in this book. I have no idea if you'll get expelled (even arrested) so... READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. Can't say I didn't warn you. Because I just did. Just be careful okay? I DIDN'T...