Pretty When You Cry (An Ethan Dolan fanfiction)

Chapter 34

Hannah stays at mine for the night. She thinks I'll run away again and do something insane. I didn't necessary run away, I just needed time for myself but I guess because I was in such a mess, they began thinking the worse. I definitely won't be telling my mom about this, she gets back in less than five days and I haven't even had a house party or get together. So much has happened this past few weeks of summer, a proper roller coaster if you ask me.

It's only 8:30 but I wake Hannah up so we can get to her car. I have no idea how we'll get to it, unless she asks Grayson and Ethan to drive her there. But then she'll make me go with her and I have a feeling it'll be really weird. I still need to speak to Ethan about everything, maybe this is a chance. Yesterday was one of the most emotional days I've ever and it was exhausting and draining but I feel okay today.

Hannah wakes up and sits on my bed for a while.

"How are you feeling?" I stand up and walk to the window.

"I'm feeling okay..." I stare into the distance emotionless.

"You're gonna be fine, I promise."

I nod and turn to face her.

"We should probably get ready to bring your car back."

She looks at me and nods.

A few moments later she decides to make us both breakfast. I need a shower right now. I walk into the bathroom and turn the water on. I take off my oversized t-shirt and hop in. The water feels super cold at first making me breathe rapidly. It gets warmer and I close my eyes and let the water soak my skin. I still feel disorientated after yesterday but I can't keep thinking about what happened. The only way to fix this is to talk to him.

I lather and rinse my body before getting out and pat myself dry. I put on my silk robe and head down stairs for some food. God, I haven't had a proper meal in days, I adore Hannah for always trying to look after me.

It smells like pancakes and cinnamon. Yum. I walk into the kitchen and see the amount of food set on the table. I put my hands over my mouth and smile.

"Oh my god, Hannah you didn't have to do this! It smells amazing!" I walk to the table and take in all the colours of fruit cut up.

"Girl please. You should see me at dinner, I'm practically a chef, besides you haven't eaten well. It's my pleasure." She sits opposite me and we dig in.

We finish up and put the dishes into the dishwasher and we head upstairs. I don't think I'll be joining Hannah today, honestly I just want to stay indoors.

"Hann, you can wear any of my clothes."

I walk into my room and sit in front of my mirror. Hannah walks in and sits on my bed.

"I need to take a shower, I smell like shit." We both laugh.

"Ew..." I look at her and laugh,

"Is it okay if I call Gray or Ethan? I really need to get my car back. I'll understand if you don't want me to..."

I look at her.

"No, go ahead. But I'm not coming with you, I'm sorry... It'll just be really awkward." She frowns at me like a kid.

"But, but... Please..." She gives me puppy dog eyes.

"Nuh uh." I shake my head.

"Okay fine. But stay here until I get back... Please." Why does she say it like that. Like I'm going to do something reckless. God.

"Yes yes, now go get ready."

She rushes out and heads to the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and decide to put on my usual makeup but skip the heavy eyeliner. I'm not digging that lately. I want to look decent and not dead.
I walk to my wardrobe and take out black high waisted mom jeans with a distressing on one knee and wear a cropped white tee from topshop. It just about covers my stomach. I wear my worn out vans in navy and put on my delicate jewellery. I leave my hair natural with beachy waves. I'm starting to feel like myself again. I sit on my bed and wait for Hannah. I put on some tunes to get the day going. I plop myself on the bed and stare at the ceiling. I think of every possible thing to say to Ethan when I see him. Deep down I don't want to talk about it, but I know I have to.