Living Short in Bel Air (Completed 2013)

Chapter 28: Mary didn't have a little lamb. Because she cooked it. ;)

Not edited :) until end of book

Chapter 28: Mary didn’t have a little lamb.  Because she cooked it. ;)

I froze.

You know I wasn’t the type that does the norm.  Clearly, whispering a small, ‘hello?’ would be overrated.  For all I knew, the mysterious figure could have been a serial killer who was obsessed with skinning little Southern girls who had cravings for sugary treats. 

So I took my chances. 

“I have a Minnie Mouse pillow!” I harshly warned.   An eerie silence filled the air.  The hairs on my arms stood up.  I gulped, my stomach dropping ten feet.  “Please don’t kill me.  I’ll make you a sandwich, oh great and powerful one.”

The silence stretched further. 

Confusion clouded my mind and I moved a hazard step forward.  Squinting, I approached with my karate chopping hands ready.  “You know, I’m actually the long decent of Bruce Lee.” 

A heavy object fell on top of me.  I screamed as my head collided with the grass.  My lungs burned as I shouted.    

Ruff!

My eyes widened.  “Friday?” 

The mutt slobbered a wet kiss across my salty cheek.  He removed his paws, and scampered around me. 

“Why you sneaky båstard!”  I dusted myself off, and pointed an accusing finger.  Thank god the street lights were faint, or I would have given into those big puppy pupils.  “I swear to bacon Gods, I’m going to cook you if you try to do that again!” 

He continued to scamper around, clearly not giving a shit about my rather crude rant.  Ah, that made two of us.  “C’mon you fuzz ball,” I sighed, ushering him inside the house.  It wasn’t a moment longer until I was dressed in my Powerpuff Girls pyjamas and zombie slippers. 

Then my phone dropped out of my purse.  Before I was able to check for any messages, I immediately shut it off.  “It’s just gonna be me, Friday, and sugar,” I informed, throwing the device in my bed. 

I dragged the enormous blue fluffy blanket behind my feet as I marched up the hall into the movie room.  Mr. Fluffy aka Big Ass Pink Fluffy Unicorn of Death in one arm, and my basket full of sweets in the other, I plopped my butt on the queen bed. 

Friday not far, he nuzzled under my shoulder.  Searching through Netflix, I found Freaky Friday and gladly played it.  This brought back the memory of when I first got Friday, naming him while watching this.  “Good times,” I muttered, scratching behind his ear.  I watched again as Lohan and her mom cracked the fortune cookies open.

“Screw sappy romantics.  I’d rather watch some funny shit.”

****************

When I said ‘funny shit’, I didn’t really mean it literally.  Eight o’clock in the morning, Ruby, my mom and I were all in the living room exactly how we were nearly a month ago. 

“And you’re happy about this?” Ruby blurted.  After previously hearing my mom state that she broke up with Harley, both my aunt and I were shocked. 

“Of course.”  My mom made another attempt to swerve her hips.  Did I forget to mention she was trying out the new Xbox game she won at the Bel Air Ball draw?  My mom snapped her waist to the side, failing to pull off what I think was the salsa.  “Harley and I decided last night that it would be for the best if we’re just friends.  We have so many things in common, but we both aren’t ready for a real relationship.”