My Sweetest Sin ~ A collection of Attack on Titan One-shots

Never coming home ~ mixed AU

|| Spoilers for the manga and anime ||

"Thankyou, Levi" Erwin forces out before closing his eyes and letting all his strength crawl away from him. A short burst of air emerges from between his lips before his life slips away.

As the light begins to fade behind Erwin's eyes a stronger more yellow light pushes forward. He's gone from the world, his life lost, but standing before him are familiar faces and then some that aren't too recognisable. His mouth gapes in shock, he reaches for his cape to cover his right shoulder but feels something brush his fingers.

"Commander" Petra and the team salute, a faint smile on their faces, tears in her eyes.

"Petra, Miche ? How? M-my arm..." He stutters, completely shocked. His eyes lock with his hand, throne he thought he lost a long time ago. He moves his fingers, intrigued as to how they're moving and salutes back, properly salutes like he did all that time ago.

"Glad to see you sir, just wish it could be a while later" Petra clears her throat and tells him. His face is one of a confused child, unaware of his surroundings.

"What's happening, am I dreaming" Erwin breathes heavily trying to piece together what's happening. "You-you're all dead. The mission outside the walls"

"We are. Sadly we all are, you included sir" an unrecognisable voice is heard from the corner of the room "Marco Bodt, I never had the pleasure of meeting you, I never made it to the survey corps. The Titans got to me before I had the chance to join, you know all my friends"

"Titans? Your friends?" He asks him still confused.

"I trained with Eren Jaeger, Mikasa Ackerman, Armin Arlet and-" his voice cuts out before he takes a deep breath "Jean Kirstein"

"I'm sorry Bodt, I'm sure you would have been an asset to the team" Erwin replies, still grasping the concept of his death.

"Um, Mr Commander sir, do you know how He s? Is he okay?" Marco asks, not really wanting the answer or saying Jeans name.

"He misses you but he's a strong, brave soldier. You won't see him for a while." Marco smiles after the commander has given him the only answer he'd hoped for. He nods and proceeds to look around the room. It's like a meeting room, a long wooden table with a fruit bowl in the centre. The candles give a warm feel about the room, Petra pulls a chair out so Erwin can sit beside them.

"So, I suppose you have a lot to tell" Ouro puts his feet on the table and everyone else sits down, eager to hear the stories. Before Erwin can begin, the door illuminates, "No, no no no not another" Petra worries to herself.

"What's happening?" Erwin asks the red head.

"When that door" she points out "lights up it means someone else has died" the room is completely lit up, voices echo off the walls. A recognisable one at that.

"EREN" Marco shouts, standing up. A hand reaches out the door and slowly a body follows. "Armin? No it's not your time"

The faint screams of Armin and Levis name echo until Marco's eyes become watery and he's pushing Armin backwards "Not yet, Arlet" Erwin turns around and helps, placing his hands on Armins chest pushing forward "They need you"

His finger tips disappear behind the door as it closes. "Marco..." everyone just looks at him in awe.

"I may not have made it to the scouts but I knew Armin, he was my friend and I know that whatever happened to him shouldn't have and he deserves to be given more time" The tears cloud his eyes but refuse to fall.

"It's my fault" Erwin says stepping forward "Levi had to choose whether to save me or Armin, we were both goners. I lived out my time in the scout regiment, what good is a soldier that can't salute anyway? I was gone but by then I'd taken up so much time that they nearly lost Armin too. If I'd have died earlier or told someone that Armin is more desperate than that wouldn't have happened"

"Levi had to let you die, for Armin..." Petra says quietly. She speaks up"Levi had to make that decision on his own?"

Erwin takes Petra in his arms, pulling her fragile frame gently into his chest. Her tears making the green cape look darker. "I miss it" she cries, looking up at him "I miss him"

"We all do, Petra. You're not alone" Oulo and Miche comfort her. "But you don't want to see him soon, because that takes him away from his life"

"I know but I'm allowed to be selfish sometimes, I can want him to die for my own reasons. I can hope he never falls in love-" Petra stops herself and looks at Erwin's nervous expression, his head facing away from her. "What? Erwin? Does he already have a girlfriend?"

"Eren" Marco blurts out, everyone turns to him, Erwin flustered. "Levi doesn't have a girlfriend. He has a boyfriend- Eren"

Petra sits down and buries her head in her hands, recalling every memory she can involving both Eren and Levi. Every conversation, every scream in the battlefield and each insult thrown Erens way.

"They snuck around a lot, they never displayed anything in front of anyone" Erwin tells the room, mildly frustrated.

"Then how do you know? Huh?" Petra snaps, emotional and regretful.

"I caught them one night. I heard them at Eren's cell, they never knew I know" Erwin tries to sympathise with her, he wasn't told, he wasn't favoured. It was a complete accident. He stands straight, like he's addressing soldiers of the 104th. "They were being inappropriate and disobeying orders but then again it wasn't just them"

He shifts his eyes to Marco's pink face, his freckles appearing darker compared to his red face. "Marco?" Petra asks, her tears no longer bursting from her eyes like a broken damn. "God I had no idea how clueless and ignorant I was"

"You didn't know about Marco and Jean? I thought it was pretty obvious" Oulo smirks.

"Um, but how? I was gone by the time you met him" Marco asks confused.

"He never stopped thinking about you and talking to you. He'd kids his hand that he'd hold your ashes in, he's swear to avenge you, he'd cry, he'd say your name on guard in the woods, how do you think I know?" Oulo lists bringing Marco's emotions from shock to deep sadness.

"He'd- he would?" Marco chokes back tears and sits next to Petra, exchanging a thoughtful glance. "He did"

"Does. He still does, Bodt" Marco looks down at Petra's hand and exhales heavily.

"Hey, Marco, can I ask you something" Petra asks, he nods as Petra bites her lip "Why don't you ever say his name, we all know it's Jean. Why haven't you ever mentioned him?"

Marco sits and thinks, motionless. His mind is cast back to when he was by Jeans side, flying over rooftops in a hell like place, death everywhere but they were not shook. It was safe as far as they were concerned, they had each others back.

"That's enough, now" Miche speaks up and let's Marco free from his thought.

"I'm sorry, Marco. I didn't mean-" Petra apologises before she's interrupted

"It doesn't matter" Marco states boldly, his manners and kind voice abandon him momentarily. He composes himself and recognises his attitude "That was rude-"

"It's fine, I get it. I'm sorry" She apologises and moves over to the door. She clears her throat and points to the door "We don't know who's gonna come walking through this door next. We can't do much to control who it is. We can't change what happened to us and we can't protect our loved ones from waking through. What we can do is wait, we can wait to see our friends and wait to hear about the ones still alive. We can hell each other and be there for the next one to come through that door. Don't get me wrong, I am dying to see my family and friends and everyone else but I've realised that waiting and crying about them isn't going to help them live the long life they all deserve. I don't know if you realise but we are all still soldiers and I did not resign from my duties as a scout. I had it assumed for me by the constable. My life is still pledged to the protection and restoration of humanity, I might not be on the same world as Levi and Eren and Hanji and the King and every other person who still lives, but my duties are not done as a scout. Not now, not ever"

She leads them in saluting. Erwin steps forward to stand beside Petra. "My duties are not done, not now not ever"

Everyone shouts back the words at the commander.

"Not now,

Not ever..."