Discovering

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Hello. How are you? Hello.... Still unresponsive. Get the......

*Gasp*

Who's there.
Hello!
Who are you?
Are you the guy in my head. 
Are you 'Him'
Hello....

Is there even anyone there?
Im going insane.

I honestly don't see the point anymore. 
Do you?

I dont care that im talking to a book anymore. You listen. 
I really dont know what to do anymore. 
Ive tried to do so much and its not working out anymore.
Nothing is. Nothing has.

I want the end to come. I don't want an anymore.
I know how to stop it all. But im scared. But I know its not for long. 

Im stuck in a life time of repeat.  
Time is going down and I still dont know who I am or what I want to do with life,  Im just falling through the cracks beneath me. But I land. Im just waiting for the crack that I dont land. The crack that ends it.
Im just waiting. 

Ive been lost for too long. You've been the only one to keep me company.
No one else cares in the slightest. 
No one. 

I am always cured out by everyone. I know when i'm not wanted. I know i'm not wanted.

No one wants me. No one needs me. I am just left.

Left to be cruelly manipulated and controlled by what ever this is. Thrown about and chucked away from the good. My life. Ruined. Because of this. 

I hate it. I want it to end.
But I know how.
I will do it.. Trust me i wont joke. I will do it.
Leave everything shattered. Ruined. Give back what they have given me. 
Ive had enough. I will end it.
I can promise you that.

*Next Day*

Good last morning. 
How are you?

I feel slightly anxious. But I know this will sort everything out. Make everything smooth again. Make everything sweet.

The wind is blowing. The trees are swaying and the birds are chirping. 
Its been raining and I can still smell it in the muggy air and on the freshly cut grass.
The clouds begin to cover the sky like a blanket putting me to rest and saying good night. Like a well ending fairy tale that a mother reader her son or daughter.

Im enjoying my last bike ride. Alone. Going to... the bridge. 
I said I would do it and I am. Are you proud of me? 
There is the only place I know that would do the job needed to get away from this hell whole. Where he wont get me. Where I can just... just fall to the end. I wont have to wait much longer. Nor will you. 

I know you read this, but you wont have to for much longer. It'll all be over soon, sooner than you think. You can close the book for good. Leave it in your bookshelf not to be read again, or in the window of a charity shop for less than a pound. At least it'll be doing something effective. Unlike me at the moment.

I can see the bridge. The end. I drop my bike into some bushes left to be forgotten there. I walk the rest of the way make it more scenic. I begin to run. Run like the foot steps in my head. Running to the end. Running for the exit. Running... to freedom. What i've been looking for. What i've wanted. What i've dreamt of for so long. 

There are no cars to be heard or seen. No people to get in my way. No one stopping me. It's perfect. The muggy air full of water is brushing against my face and the wind pushing me side to side. The lights in the distance begin to get brighter as people begin to wake up from their rest. Their rest ends when mine is about to begin. This is beautiful. I couldn't have pictured it better if I had tried. 

Well... This is it I guess. Thank you for reading I hope that you have enjoyed... this. What ever this is. Don't reccomend me to a friend. Don't tweet about me. Not make some pathetic 'OMG this book is so #Relatable' because its not. You've not experienced what I have. 

I'll place you here. Goodbye friend.  

*Gasp*

  

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