Dancing in the Rain ~ A Supernatural Fanfiction

Chapter 6 ~ Its too late

“Hey Sammy.” I say as he looks me up and down. “You got taller.” I joke.

“Dean can I talk to you for a minute?” He says, not taking his eyes off me. They look deep into mine with a serious glare.

“Yeah. Sure.” Dean replies before turning his head to me. “Can you give us a sec?” I nod and he kisses my cheek tenderly, whispering ‘thanks’ into my ear before pulling away.

I walk past Sam and out the door, heading across to the motel vending machine. I push a few coins through the slot and hit the button. A warm can of soda noisily comes out and I pick it up, popping the lid.

I sit on the curb and slowly drink it, the bubbles fizzling down my throat. As I drain the last drops I see Dean emerge from the room, slamming the door behind him. I drop the can in the metal bin next to me as I stand up. I walk quickly over to him and can see by the way his shoulders are tensed that he’s angry. He’s facing the wall as I reach him.

“Dean.” I say as I rest my hand on his shoulder.

He turns suddenly, pushing my hand away as he grabs me by the shoulders and slams me against the wall. I let out a pained gasp as my head hits the brick. When I open my eyes I can see the anger raging in his, but there’s also sadness. A deep, nestling sadness that makes me want to hug him, and soothe him.

“Dean what happened?”

He doesn’t reply, just moves his hands to my face and kisses me. But his lips only connect for a few seconds before he pulls away, mumbling to himself. I try to move my lips to his but he bangs his fist against the wall to the side of my head and says ‘No’ his eyes squeezing shut. When he lets go and steps away I’m left shaking, but I need this to be over. I need him, now.

“Kiss me.” I tell him. He turns away. “Dean. Just kiss me!” I scream as a single tear runs down my cheek.

“What did he say to you? To make you act like this.” I ask. “Answer me!” I yell when he doesn’t say anything.

“To make me act like what?” He yells, turning to face me.

“Act as if I’m just some cheap hooker.”

“Why should you be anything more than that to me?” He says, deadly serious.

“Dean... I... I thought you...” I can’t finish, my words trail off.

“You were going to say ‘loved you’ weren’t you?” He laughs.

“I’m not sure. But I thought you felt something towards me.”

“I guess you were wrong then.” No. He has to be lying. Why is he doing this?

“Then why?”

“Why what?”

“Why everything?!” I scream. “Why protect me, why kiss me?”

“I protected you because we’re the same person. The kiss was just a heat of the moment thing.” He looks away as I start to cry. “I’m going to call Cas later. See if he’s made any progress on getting you home. The sooner you’re out of here the better.”

As he moves for the door I look to him and see the unmistakable path of a tear crawling down his cheek.  I quickly move in front of the door, blocking his path.

“Deanna...” he sighs. I reach out and wipe the tear from his cheek. His jaw clenches as my fingers make contact but he doesn’t move away. So I step forward and gently kiss him. He shakes his head numbly as a single, perfect tear runs down his cheek. “We can’t.”

“Why not?” I whisper.

“We’re the same person D. You’re going to leave at some point. I’m never going to see you again. It’d be easier for both of us if nothing more happened.

“Dean.” I say as I wrap my arms around his neck. “It’s too late. I love you.”

“I’m sorry.” He says, resting his head on my chest as he quietly sobs.

“It’s okay.” I whisper, stroking his hair tenderly as I cradle him. I watch the sun slowly setting behind us, the sky glowing with light. And then the thought occurs to me.

Would it be so bad if I never left?