Ignite My Heart

1.Ignite My Heart

I walked down the busy and crowded streets of London with an oversized hood covering my face, my hideous face, from the harsh weather.

 I could feel some people stare at me in disgust, I would as well, I mean, if I saw someone dressed like me even I would stare at them in disgust because of their clothes.

I tried to ignore the stares as I pushed past rude people to get to my run-down apartment that only allowed me to stay for 2 nights but I had to pay £80. I trudged in and stuffed my hands into my pockets, searching for the old iron keys. Whilst I was walking, looking down, I bumped into my mother/roommate Leslie. She opened her mouth to swear at me but when she realized that it was me, by my hair and clothes she instantly shut it and bent down to my level since I was extremely short.

"Rachel darling, what are you doing out here so late? You do realize that it is 11 o'clock at night don't you?" She asked, talking to me like I didn't understand or if i had a disability.

I rolled my eyes at her not in the mood to talk to her since i was still pissed of from before.

flashback:

I walked into my small room, noticing that there was something wrong, but I just shrugged it of, thinking that it was because I havn't ate yet. I walked around noticing that my hot pink walls looked plainer than usual and there were a few lighter patches that you couldn't really notice unless you looked closely. 

I eyed a few more things such as my drawer that was missing a few, wait, a lot of CD's and magazines. I sat down and then finally realized that my secret stash of food was not under my bed, I ran to my closet and frantically rummaged through it and saw that nearly half of my fucking clothes were missing!

It finally fit altogether, the light patches that were usually covered by posters, the missing CD's and my missing secret stash of food that I always kept under my bed.

It was Leslie! It had to be her!

She was the only one that I allowed into my room but she took things away from me!

I stalked out of my room and down to the kitchen were she was reading a newspaper and drinking a mug of coffee. I snatched her newspaper away, angrily, and threw it to the other side of the kitchen.

She raised her eyebrow at me and looked at me in confusion.

"Rachel, love whats wrong? Is something upsetting you? I can always listen if you want me to."

She commented in a fake innocent voice, acting like she didn't do anything.

"You went into my room..." I whispered, to angry to speak.

she tilted her head to the side and asked "what?"

I glared at her through my bangs and opened my mouth once again.

"You went into my room...you went into my fucking room and took things away that you knew were important to me...give my damn things back you selfish bitch!" I yelled at her letting my anger and frustration out.

Now it was her turn to glare at me. She smiled in a cruel way. "What did you call me?" she asked in an  low voice.

I stared at her, to shocked to move, I did it this time, I thought. There was one rule in my book, well imaginary book, the first one was NEVER piss Leslie of.

Trust me, last time I did that it wasn't very pleasant or nice. She walked up to me and grasped my hair whilst still glaring at me. "Go to your room now!" she whispered, I shook my head trying to escape her hands and accidentally punched her in the face.

I stood their shocked, I had never and I mean never hit her before, even if it was an accident.

I yanked my hair out of her grasp and ran out the door without my jacket, and might I add, it was freezing out their.

flash back over

I walked into the apartment, suddenly feeling hot, since I was wearing 3 thick layers because of the horrid weather outside. I looked around, realizing that the wall that Leslie painted was already chipping, not that I care, I was leaving tomorrow anyway.

I walked into my room and was greeted by the sight of my dark pink walls that were covered in graffiti and pictures of my friends, well my ex-friends.

I still remember the day that they left me.

The most painful day of my life...

I shook my head, trying to get rid of the painful memories and that certain tingling feeling on my left wrist. As I walked to my bed, I also walked passed the mirror that was hanging from my wall, I stared at it for a little to long and i don't know why but i just lost it when I saw my blood red eyes that I usually cover up with brown contact lenses.

With one swift motion, I swung my fist back and punched the mirror.

 My breath came out as short pants and i could feel my face slowly going red. I squeezed my eyes shut and my jaw automatically clenched shut. I bought my fist back and inspected it, nothing to bad, I thought when I saw small shards of glass sticking out and blood slowly dripping onto the wooden floor.

I sighed and walked up to my desk and grabbed the gauze, some ointment along with some tweezers. I trudged over to my bed and sat down whilst getting ready for the pain to come and attack me when I take the the glass shards out.

Whilst slowly taking the glass shard out, i wondered and thought,

"Why couldn't I be normal? Why couldn't I act act normally? Why don't I have a normal family? Why don't I have a normal life?"

I could feel hot tears at the back of my eyes, but i refused to let them out.

I never cried.

No matter how many bad situations I went through, I never shed a tear.

Not even at my parents funeral.

Wanting to forget about these feelings, I added more pressure to my bandaged knuckles, making them ache. As soon as the pillow hit my head, I was dead.

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Hey guys! sorry if this was a bit crappy! To tell you the truth, this is not my first story i had another account but i forgot the password so i made a new one! Ta-Dah!

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