My Roommate's Secret

22 MICAH

I took care of Loui now.

He had to stay in bed for a while, he was still a bit weak from the blood loss and his concussion needed time to heal. He'd have to deal with the broken leg for a bit longer and maybe need a wheelchair or at least crutches, but not yet.

In order to be there for Loui, I skipped some of my classes, which Loui of course did not approve of, but I could not simply leave him alone.

What if he got hungry or needed a drink, because he choked on something or there was a fire in the dorm buildings and he could not get out on his own ... okay maybe that was a bit dramatic,but still.

Although Loui did not want any help with getting changed or something like that. I do not know if he was too shy or too proud, but he kept hurting himself over and over again trying to do it himself and I could not do anything about it, even though I really wanted to.

So I just brought him food and his homework – he really insisted on doing homework, although his professors said he did not need to – and tried to cheer him up a bit.

Miyu spent her afternoons in our room, which was kind of annoying after a while, because, jesus, she really did talk a lot. But I did not mind als long as it made Loui happy, because not being able to go out really bothered him and I hated seeing him like that.

When I got home after getting new food I also brought some DVDs, because there was not much else Loui could do.

Though, when I held up the DVDs, he groaned and shook his head – slowly, because his head still hurt, even though he would not admit that.

"I can't watch another movie", he sighed. "I already started dreaming about that shit and if it goes on like that soon I won't remember what my real life is like anymore!"

I laughed at that and put the movies on my desk: "Okay, what do you wanna do instead?"

"Nothing, just sit down. You don't have to entertain me the whole time, you know", he explained and I knew how guilty he felt for keeping me here all day long. But I did not want to be anywhere else.

I sat next to him on his bed and we did not speak for awhile.

But then I remembered that before his accident I decided to find out more about him and this was a great opportunity.

"What's your favourite music?", I blurted out and he flinched slightly.

"Sorry", I chuckled and he thought about my question for a moment: "I like almost every music, to be honest... um, i have lots of songs from Twenty One Pilos or ... All TimeLow?"

I made a mental note so I could check if there were any concerts of those bands soon.

"And your favourite food?", I asked, then.

"Pancakes, I guess?"

"Where did you grow up?"

He sat up a bit and looked at me: "Why all those questions?"

I just shrugged and looked at him expectantly, so he told me about his hometown and also about his parents.

"So you don't have any siblings?"

"Nope."

"And what do you want to be when your older?"

"A teacher", he said and then frowned: "Wait, have we really never talked about what we were even studying here?!"

I laughed: "No, not really. That's why I ask, I barely know you and I feel like you know a lot more about me than I do about you."

"You're right ...", a smile appeared on his lips: "So what do you study?"

"Rocket science."

"What?", he seemed to be surprised by that.

"Yeah, when I was a kid my dad always told me about the universe and the stars and he explained the planets and all that to me. When he ... died I was only nine years old and my mom said that he was up there now. I've always wanted to become an astronaut and the universe fascinated me ... it somehow makes me feel closer to my dad."

When I ended, Loui just stared at me with wide eyes, saying nothing.

I eventually felt uncomfortable, because I did not know what he was thinking and asked: "What?"

"Nothing", he breathed. "It's just ..."

He then began to lean forward and suddenly I felt his lips touch mine.

I closed my eyes for those few seconds, until he pulled away.

When I opened them, Loui looked upset. He lay back and muttered: "I shouldn't have done that ..."

"I didn't mind", I simply said, but Loui still frowned: "You have to leave now ... because I would do that if I could, but I can't, so ... please go."

I sighed, slowly standing up: "Why are you so against this?"

Loui looked at me for a while and when I thought he would not reply anymore, his face turned serious and he said: "I don't want this, please go now."

I scoffed and turned away angrily. "Fine."