Lord of The Things: An RIFT parody PART ONE

Hisoka Needs It

"..." Mikoto was in complete silence. Her eyes were buried within the book in her hands. the spectacular epic that stroked upon it, words of amazing literature.

This was the first time she had read any of J.R.R. Tolkein's works, and she had to say, she was impressed by the imersion this world provided. This spectacular story etched upon these pages. Incredible.

She read a little more, shivering with delight at the darkness of the Mines of Moria, the epic chase of the Nagul's search for the One Ring..

This was WAY better than the movie..

"HEYYYYYYY!!!"

Mikoto screamed and fell off her chair, her back landing on the hard wood of the Fairy Tail guild hall as Natsu grinned at her. "Watcha readin'?"

Mikoto glared at Natsu. "SERIOUSLY!? come on.. Natsu, you know I hate it when people do that as I read!"

"Is that Lucy's book?" Natsu said. "Don't tell me she published it already.."

"The Railgun In Fairy Tail series.. or just that other series she's been writing since she got to Fairy Tail?" Mikoto muttered as she stood up and dusted herself off. "I don't think either of those are published yet. One of them's online and one is still on paper.."

"Weird how she uses that MisakaLovesYou name as her profile.." Natsu said. "Wait.. Lord.. of the Rings? What the heck is that?"

"Really?" Mikoto said, looking shocked. "You've watched Transformers, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and over a dozen episodes of Trinity Seven and you STILL haven't heard of Lord of the Rings?"

"Does it involve Onion Rings?" said Natsu.

"Oh dear god.." Mikoto said. "okay.. you have ABSOLUTELY got to read this, it's pretty much one of the best Fantasy Novels from my world. "

"Did somebody say something about a good fantasy Novel!?" Levy Mcgarden came over, looking thrilled. "I think books are my specialty! Heehee! So what is this book?"

"Lord of the Rings." said Mikoto.

"Never heard of it.." said Levy, taking the book with interest and flipping through it. "Wow, this book is THICK.. and 3 parts too! They had to make pretty thin pages to fit all this in.."

"Lord of the Rings is pretty much actually six books with 3 parts. " said Mikoto. "The first part is the Fellowship of the Ring, the second is the Two Towers, and the third is the Return of the King. It also has one prequel called The Hobbit, but I don't entirely think you need to have read the Hobbit to get this story, they actually explain what happened in the Hobbit quite a bit.."

"What's a Hobbit? Can I eat it?" Natsu asked.

"Well we'll explain it won't we! When we read my FAAAAN FICCCTIOOOON!!!" said a familiar voice as a puff of smoke and confetti filled the room.

The masked harlequin himself Twilight Prankster landed in the middle of the Guild Hall, chuckling as he held up a hard cover book. "PREPARE YOURSELF!! For the now published, and available to readers around the Multiverse.. LORD OF THE THINGS!!!"

Everyone stared at Prankster, not sure what to think.

"You.. can't expect us to read that.. " Mikoto said.

"HELL YEAH I EXPECT YOU TO READ IT!!" Prankster roared. "It's received over 500 awards across the Multiverse!!! CHECK IT OUT!!"

Prankster tossed Mikoto the book and she looked at the inner cover. "Best Toilet Humor?! Most Flat Chested Main Chara-.. wait.. I'M THE MAIN CHARACTER!?"