Better Than Revenge

Kabanata 1

Betrayal

"Umalis na tayo dito.."

"Ano bang ginagawa mo?"

"Baka may makakita saatin dito.. Ano pang isipin nila..."

"Uy!"

Napabuga ako ng hangin ng wala sa oras. Galing sa pagtanaw sa loob ng dalawang sirkulong bagay ay ibinaling ko sa aking kasama ang aking paningin.

Agad kong nasilayan ang kanyang nakabusangot na mukha.

"Ano ba? Kita mong busy 'yong tao dito!" Hindi ko na alintana kung ako pa ang galit ngayon. Looking at something or rather someone right now is my top priority.

Hindi ko na rin hinintay ang kanyang reaksyon saaking iritasyon. Nagawa ko pa siyang irapan dahil sa inis. Ibabalik ko na sana ang aking tingin sa hawak hawak na bagay nang marinig ko ang kanyang sagot.

"Ate..."

Napabuntong hininga ako. I know it was wrong to suddenly drag him here out of selfishness, but I just can't do this alone. I need someone with me right now.

"Ate naman.." Natigil ako sa ginagawa. Seeing his concerned face makes me want to break down. Yet, I can't. I won't..

I don't have any options right now. I've isolated myself from others and the outside world for a month, now. And no one knows about my fucked up situation. Not even my friends. Kaya sino ang pagkakatiwalaan ko? Sino ang magiging kakampi ko?

"Alam mong wala akong ibang maaasahan, Ran.. Ikaw lang."

Lumambot ang ekspresyon ng aking kapatid matapos niyang makita ang malungkot kong mukha. Hindi na siya kumibo sa sinabi ko. Ngumiti ako ng matipid sa kanya. Alam kong napapayag ko na ito sa gusto ko kahit pa labag iyon sa kanyang kalooban.

Pinagmasdan ko ang kanyang pagtalungko sa kinauupuan. He adjusted his eyeglasses before sighing. I shook my head again. Ran is innocent and he's a good boy. I am lucky to have him as my little brother.

Tinitigan ko lamang siya ng ilang sandali bago muling hawiin ang halamang humaharang sa aking paningin. Malapit nang mabali ang mga sanga noon subalit wala akong pakialam.

Today was a hot, summer day.. Bullets of sweat was forming in the sides of my head, as I stared into the telescope I was holding.

Few meters away from where we sat, a girl was sitting quietly in a bench under the comforting shade of a big tree..

Naglapat ang labi ko. I bet it was as cool as shit there. Samantalang.. Sinulyapan ko ang aming pinagtataguan, ni wala kaming ibang mapagsilungan kung hindi ang maliit na puno ng bayabas sa aking tabi. The sun is on its highest peak today and the heat was scorching, but we chose to endure it for this.. Humigpit ang hawak ko sa teleskopyo. If this was not necessary, I won't even think of doing this. I won't risk my whole body for this!

Damn it. Spying was not my style but I had no other choice of knowing! Wala akong source, wala akong mapagkukunan ng impormasyon!

This was all their fault. It was her fault.. The same girl who sat comfortably across us!

The lens revealed her uneasiness as she tugged through the ends of her white dress. Napangiwi ako, naniningkit ang mga mata. She's nervous? What? Why? Ngayon pa?

"Ate, hindi ka ba naiinitan? Ang init.."

Umikot na ng kusa ang aking mata. Yes, of course! Kanina pa! Hindi ba halata? Basang basa na ng pawis ang aking noo at likod! Though, I'm not telling him that.

"Shut up! Mabilis na lang to!" It's now quarter to twelve, and any minute now..

"He'll be here, I know.." my voice toned down on its own. I tasted something bitter in my mouth. I still remember his schedules. His morning class ended five minutes ago, so I know he'll be here any minute. I bit my lip. This lingering memories are unneccesary but I just can't help it, can I? It's only been a month.. Just a month..