Late night thoughts

Love me not

"I'll never stop loving you." He says as I cry.
"I'll never leave." As he lets go of my hand and touches my face.
"I'm with you forever." He says as he kissed me softly.

I believed him. I was foolish enough to believe he would stay until we both died, or at least one of us did.

He started getting distant, not talking to me for days at a time, of being happy when we hung out. Then, the day came. I texted him begging him to talk to me, to say something, anything.

And he did.

"I don't love you anymore."

I told him he was breaking my heart, he said he didn't even care.

So I ended it, i couldn't bare the thought of being with him anymore.

I went to the places we went to together, I ate alone at our favorite restaurant, I looked at photos of us and saw him smile and it made my heart sink. I remember the way he smelled and how he likes his pizza and what show he'd watch every Saturday through Sunday. But the happy memories were tainted with sad ones.

Like when he left me alone in the rain after he told me he couldn't deal with me. Like after every fight he blamed me, like when he sent his friends the pictures that were only for his eyes.

My love for him started to bubble alway, and it was replaced with disgust. He was the rudest person I have ever met, he didn't care about anyone's needs, he didn't care about me.

He started dating a girl two weeks later, and I started talking to a boy. We were both happy without each other and happier with the people we were now.

He's like a stranger to me, does he still snort when he laughs? Does he stack his pizza anymore? Does he sleep freezing cold with eight blankets on him? I don't know anymore, but I hope he's doing well.

Because I'm doing well without him.