Hawthorne Heights

Aden (Ch4)

                When I awoke, I started to hear footsteps below me and I could smell the scent of cinnamon rolls that were sitting on my computer desk.

                “Nellie…” I whispered as I yawned. Nellie is my little sister; she works with our aunt in the kitchen. The Hawthorne’s told my sister “For the safety of Alex, don’t tell her or even hint that you are his sister and your aunt can play the role as your mother, we don’t need your brother to ruin this.” My sister has kept that promise; fearing something would happen to me, even if she sees Alex looking hurt or lost. I remember when I was assigned to move here and finally watch over her, I remember the nights I heard her cry, It was agonizing, not being able to comfort her or even touch her.

                I stopped thinking, feeling the pinching in my chest. It always happened when I thought of her. I shoved the thought out of my head and finally got up. The smell of cinnamon rolls were too much to resist any longer. My mouth watered as I sat down and started eating them. Right as i finished the first one I heard footsteps stop and Jamie talk.

                “Something’s up der mommy. “ Jamie told her. I froze as silence grew for a few seconds before I heard Alex hurry down the stairs.

                “Alex…” I murmured as I laid my head on the desk, making sure not to hit the food. I could feel the desk shake. –God, I miss her… I want to see her, to touch her. I won’t be able to hold back any longer…I need her! and I know she needs me, and I can’t do anything. Why does my life have to be like THIS!- I hit my head on the desk and scowled myself. -I need to stop thinking about her.-

                I lifted my head and grabbed one of the cinnamon rolls; I tore off a little piece and eat it. I could taste the sweetness of the frosting, after while I started hearing Nellies voice, she was talking to Alex.

                “Alex, are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” My sister asked worriedly. I could hear Alex breathing stop for a few seconds. When she started breathing, she was gasping. I could hear her land on the ground and ran out the door towards the stairs. When she was on the stairs I heard a thud. I couldn’t stop myself from jumping up and hurrying down the stairs of the attic.

                I stopped right next to the door and my thoughts began to surface. I started thinking of what I was about to do. –I’m not allowed to do this… Should i? I think I should.- I almost hit my head on the door in frustration. –I can’t…- I told myself, and then I heard someone coming up the stairs, relief washed over me.

                “Mommy… Okay?” Jamie asked her, a few seconds later Alex started to cry in big loud sobs. I felt my heart squeeze at the sound, I couldn’t stand it, It made me want to slam my head against the door, knowing I couldn’t do anything to help her. I could feel tears of frustration surface as I laid my head against the door and let her cry torture me. I finally couldn’t take it, I gentaly opened the door a creak and saw Jamie and her hugging on the stairs. Right when I got a good look of Alex, I knew what my sister meant by her looking shattered. Her eyes were full of tears as she sobbed, and you could see the shadows from sleepless nights. I felt the urge to walk out and hold her but I cut that thought right out of my head and shut the door and locked. I turned away and walked up the attic stairs.

                Once in my room I grabbed my cell phone and dialed Nellies number. I needed to know what happened.

                “Aden.” Nellie said, knowing why I called. Her voice seemed sad.

                “What happened down there? Alex is in the hall crying.” I asked. My sister let out a sigh and finally spoke.

                “I don’t know, she was spacing out for a little while and the next thing I knew, she jumped and looked around her. It was like she heard something. So being me, I asked her what was wrong and she only stared at me, like she saw a ghost” She told me, I could hear her pacing in the kitchen, then she all of a sudden stopped.

                “Ahh Crap… I’m not wearing those stupid contacts. Now I’m…” She paused. “I’m sorry Aden..” She whispered. I knew she was thinking about me having to hear her and knowing how I’m feeling.

                “It’s okay, I’m fine.” I reassured her. “But I’ll let you go, bye.”  and I hung up.

                As I lay on my bed, I was lost in thought. The only thing I was seeing was Alex when we were kids. Whenever I had some time to think, she always popped in my head. I would remember her goofy smile with her bright blue eyes shining, and how she would space out with a grin on her face. She was an unusual kid, but I probably shouldn’t say that since she was the only kid I truly met.

             My parents never let me get close to anyone. The only other person I ever met was my babysitter who was also my teacher. She was lovely and very kind., She always knew how to make me smile and she always made sure to help me when i needed it the most. She was like a second mom in a sense. After awhile, She disappeared. My parents never told me what happened to her. I was devastated and I remember what my parents told me “You should never become attached to someone, it goes against our rules.” And then I met Alex and another attachment grew. I shook my head. –God…  The past was something I hated- Right that moment I felt my phone vibrate. It was a text message.

                From Nellie

Hey, I didn’t get in any trouble.

But I feel horrible. I just don’t understand..

Why can’t you two be together?

                I replied, that’s good, and don’t worry, she’ll be fine. I will find a way for us some day even if she taken or I get hurt. I promised her that and I’m keeping it.          

                I dropped my phone and rubbed my face. I felt tired all of a sudden, like I was carrying a loud that was too heavy for me. –It probably is…- A voice whispered in my head. I shook my head and looked towards my window; it was next to the side of my bed. The moon was half hidden in clouds. I felt a memory blossom in my head.

“What are you scared of the most?” I asked playfully one day at the park, after I kissed her and moved away. She smiled shyly.

“I’m scared of storms… There so loud and scary.” She told me, I could feel truth in her words. “How about you, What are you scared of the most?” She asked playfully, a goofy smile surfacing on her face. I could only stare at her. Her charcoal hair was luminous in the breeze as she reached up to move her bangs back to the side. She was beautiful in a different way; an unusual way

I Broke out of the memory as my phone vibrated again. I looked towards it wondering why I had two texts from Nellie. –She must be worried about me..- It thought as I read the messages.

“Ahh.. Crap…” I muttered.

From Mr. and Mrs. Height,

We need to see you and your family in 15 minutes.

You know where. We need to discuss some matters.

From Nellie

I hope you do… She’s hurting and it hurts me for you to see.

But CRAP!! They texted for a meeting, I guess I am in trouble.

                I laughed and replied ‘your fine, but I’m wondering what this is about. It doesn’t sound good. As I sent it, I dropped my phone on the bed and got up. I walked towards the window, noticing the sky was cloudy and the wind was full of humidity as I opened the window and it hit my face.

                I knew it was going to storm, I could feel the humidity already dropping as I hoisted myself up in the window sill. –This doesn’t look good… Alex will be scared… Maybe..- STOP! I told myself sternly. –I don’t need to think about her right now.- I hung myself more out the window, feeling the wind whip at my face and making my hair crazy, I looked down, knowing I was on the third floor, I looked behind me at my quiet room wishing I could lay on my bed and dwell on my life. But I knew I couldn’t, so I dived out the window pushing with my feet; Into the darkness of the storm.