Douchestuck: A Homestuck Story

Information

Goddamn, another really late chapter for this story. Wowie. Anyways, please enjoy this chapter! 

The sophomore didn't even blink at Jake, her expression still monotone, hiding whatever purpose she was here for. It was making Jake uncomfortable, still waiting for her response. "Uh, are you still there, girl?"

The girl looked up at him, finally moving her mouth and hearing something come out of it. "Yes, I am here for something actually. Information."

Jake blinked. "Information? What information?" he asked her, returning to his nervous state. What did this girl want with him? And he could tell, just from her expression, that she wasn't down to fuck

"Oh, just some information regarding what one of your friends told me to get from you," she pause for a moment, laughing softly at herself. "I never introduced myself, did I? Apologies for that, Jake. I'm Rose Lalonde. Sophomore." she held out her hand to shake it.

Jake hesitated for a moment, unsure if he should trust this girl or not. "Well, alright then. I'm Jake English, but you already know that," he winked at her, then immediately regretting it. He already knows this girl isn't interested in him in that way, yet he still tried anyways. Fucking dumbass

"Yeah, of course I do," Rose replied to him. "Anyways, about that information..."

"What about it?" Jake asked, tilting his head a little bit. He could tell Rose was intrigued by something, either another rumor rising up or maybe just wanting to be friends. Jake was fine with either or.

"Your friend John asked me to come here to ask you something," Rose told him, adjusting her glasses in that anime style way. Smh. She probably hangs out with Dirk. "He wants to know what secret you've been keeping, so you wouldn't mind telling me, would you?"

Jake grabbed his collar and stretched it out a bit, unsure of what to say. So john sent this little messenger after what he had found out? Hah, fat chance, fuckass.

"Sorry, I'm not allowed to share that information. It's private," he said to her, flashing the most awkward smile to make her go away

"Huh, all those other secrets you spilled were private as well, yet you let those ones out?" Rose made the tisk sound with her tongue, shaking her head at the senior in front of her.

Jake thought for a moment until the realization hit him: 'she just roasted me.' What a salty bitch. Who knew bookworms were so fucking savage. "Well, okay, you do have a point there. But I'm promising myself not to tell anyone this time! Not even John!" Jake stated confidently. He wasn't letting some sophmore book nerd get the best of him, especially one that's so small

"Wow, how bold of you," Rose remarked while holding back a snicker that was rising up her throat. "But, I guess if you won't tell me willingly, I guess I'll have to get it from you by force." she cracked her knuckles and gave Jake an evil look that automatically told him she was going to beat the shit out of him. Oh no

"Well hey now, girl. There's no need for violence! Please, I'll tell you, just as long as-" POW! Rose had already popped him in the fucking jaw and he was slammed against the lockers. God DAMN. 

"Well shit, love. You didn't even let me finish my sentence..." Jake gasped as he attempted to get up from the lockers, probably breaking a bone in the process. "Okay, so let me tell you what's been bothering me, and you can ONLY tell this to John!"

-

Jane sighed as she leaned on the desk in her last period class, Science. She didn't have anything against science, she just didn't want to be at school anymore. It was only ten minutes until the bell rang but it felt like one hour, she just wanted all this to be over with. She knew that afterwards she'd probably have to deal with Dirk and a jealous Jake, but she honestly didn't care as long as it got her out of class.

Five minutes passed and it felt like she was dying, so very slowly. Five more minutes until she escaped hell, five more exhausting minutes. 'Jesus Christ, why does today feel even worse than other school days?' Jane mentally asked herself, dropping in her chair slowly. She looked back at the clock, seeing that the minute hand was barely touching the thirty, meaning it was almost time to go. Just a few more moments. Just a few more

The bell ringed, and Jane immediately picked herself off of her chair, letting out a big sigh of relief. "Finally," she whispered to herself while lifting her bag onto her shoulder and running out the science lab's doorway. She continued sprinting until she finally reached the school's entrance, putting her hands on her knees as she gasped for breath, already tired from such a short jog

"I don't have to deal with anymore bullshit for the rest of the day. God. Fucking. Bless," Jane said out loud, letting out a final gasp before waiting in her car for Jake and John. Once they had got in, she stated up the engine and asked them both, "How was your day, boys?"

"Well, same as usual. Dirk is still ignoring me, even after all my confessions of love to him. What a- um, what's that anime word again for people that hide their feelings and act all rude?" Jake asked the two of them

"Tsundere," John answered, then getting a small 'thank you' from Jake. "and yeah, my day was almost the same as Jake's. Except I don't think it's that Dave is hiding his feelings, I just don't think he really cares anymore. It sucks, really. I kind of really want his attention, y'know?"

"Well I'm sorry to say that I can't relate to either of you, but it's gonna be alright. We can go get some ice cream, all on me," Jane gave them both a wink and their faces lit up while they chanted "Ice cream! Ice cream!" like little kids

Jane wouldn't admit it, but sometimes these dirks really did make her day

It's fianlly done jesus christ. Anyways, I hope y'all enjoyed and stay tuned for the next chapter, which will probably take even longer to make. Hahaha whoops