H&M

Chapter 20

"Well, I know I'm hard to take, and my bones are calling out your name. While I beat your cold windows."

Harry • • •

"Lights will guide you home and ignite your bones. I will try to fix you." Maya mouthed the words to Coldplay's Fix You.

It had been the perfect time for a depressing song to play. I watched her lips closely. Everything about her was so mesmerizing, especially the way she handled herself while being verbally and racially attacked.

Had my father ruined our future together? I was afraid of the answer. Why didn't I leave when I had the chance? We needed to have a truthful conversation.

"What are you thinking?" I turned down the radio.

"I'm thinking about how much longer I can drive before wanting to rest." She looked forward, as if I wasn't there.

Her face was casual and indifferent yet her body language told a different story. She sat perfectly upright, with her hands tightly gripping the steering wheel. Her body was tense under her tight dress.

"What are you thinking as far as this relationship goes?"

"I'm not thinking about that, right now." She replied in the same tone.

"Well can you start?" I was frustrated with the evening's events.

"What do you want me to say?" She shrugged.

"Fuck." I raised my voice before lowering it, again. "Say what you're thinking."

"Do you want to know what I'm thinking?" She raised her voice, too. She took a moment to look me in the eye. Her eyes weren't as lively as they usually were.

"Yes, Maya." I was exasperated.

"I think no matter how successful I become, no matter how much money I make, no matter how many changes I make in this world I'll still be a stereotype. I'm just a damn statistic, a future abandoned baby mother. That's just the reality of it, I have to accept it now."

"Maya," I began.

"No. It's, it's the truth, you know? What the hell am I doing at The University of Notre Dame? I'm going to get a degree? Then what? Is the world's view of me going to magically change?" She hit the steering wheel.

It hurt me to hear her look down upon herself down in that way. She was only a stereotype to those who didn't know her, and although that was most of the world, their opinions didn't matter. She was one of the most open-minded and kind-hearted people I knew and I wasn't going to let my asshole father let her think otherwise.

"Baby." I began calmly. "Do not let what my father's bigotry get in the way of your self image, goals or aspirations. He does this to everyone, I let him do this to me for years and I won't let him do it to you."

Her body language had softened, I was getting through to her.

"You're much more than a statistic." I took a deep breath. "Please talk to me instead of shutting me out."

"I'm sorry, I'm taking all my anger out on you and you really don't deserve it." She reluctantly replied.

"You have the right to be angry. I'm angry, too. I'm sorry for ever making you sit through that, I can't imagine how it feels to be minimized like that, and have no one say anything." I ran my fingers through my hair.

"You stood up for me." She nodded. "And I knew it took a lot especially when you haven't seen your mother in so long. Thank you."

"Don't thank me." I shook my head. "I couldn't just sit there and listen to him attack you."

"You could've, but you chose not to." I held her right hand while her left steered.

•••••

Maya • • •

I had been driving for a little over 2 hours. My ass was numb, I was both mentally and physically tired, and I just needed a warm shower.

Harry had fallen asleep next to me, even in his slumber he was still a beautiful man. His chest rose and fell ever so slightly, the only thing that hinted that he was alive was the quiet snores emerging from him. His hair was a curly mess atop his head, tiny beads of sweat had collected at his forehead.

I took the next exit, there had to be an affordable motel in close proximity to where we were.

I had turned the radio off after Harry fell asleep, partly because I didn't want to disturb him but also because I wanted to be alone with my thoughts.

Surely the dinner had been a disaster, it had been one of the worst confrontations I had ever had, yet I couldn't help but feel closer to Harry. The way he had stuck up for me when everyone else was comfortable remaining silent was almost comforting. Although I do wish that things were different, they could be worse.

We could choose to let his father define our relationship for us, or we could choose to be mature adults and define our relationship ourselves. If anything, this only made our bond stronger.

I spotted a non-shady place to spend the night. Flamingo Motel the neon sign read, I turned into the parking lot.

I decided to make a call before awaking Harry.

Harry • • •

I awoke abruptly to the sound of Maya's voice. She stood in close proximity to the car, and was pacing back and forth. Her right hand held her phone and her left was on her forehead. I could see her worry even through the tinted window.

"What do you mean?" She sounded outraged. She more than likely knew exactly what this person meant.

"Do whatever you can." She was now positioned so that I could see her face. She looked worn out. We made eye contact, and I offered her a smile.

She weakly smiled back. "Do whatever you can." She repeated before hanging up.

"What was that about?" I asked emerging from the car.

"That was my lawyer. Apparently things aren't going good for us." She looked at the ground, chewing her bottom lip.

"He wasn't wearing a body cam, his dash cam wasn't on, there are no eye witness that saw the whole altercation, nothing against this man." She sounded very rushed and panicked.

"You've been through enough today, I can just go get us a room." I wished I could take all her pain away, but in all honesty I knew I couldn't handle it.

She nodded slowly, barely acknowledging my existence.

I stepped into the small office before stepping out several minutes later.

"Let's get inside." I said to her after returning with keys to room 238.

"Break the locks on the gate. While I try to forget I used to be something great." - Echos (All I want)

Author's Note: So much happens in the next chapter, buckle the fuck up. (This is a warning)