Nightmare kind of Dream

Memories

Pinetree. I sent the thought into the expanse on my mind but only feeling the disconnection to him. I only know he's hidden with Tom's rabbit, I remember tearing at the original door to the human's room before Tom sent it up in flames. I don't know where my Pinetree is now. I want him back. Where are you, my Pinetree? This disconnected feeling is unsettling like I lost a bit of myself.

I sat up in my shredded bed and stared around at my hellhole of a bedroom. Clothes were everywhere, broken pieces of jewelry littered and glittered every surface they were stuck into, the sofas had stuffing bleeding out of the cushions and the walls had scars from my claws, the shimmer curtains hanging above my bed hung in tatters, everything else was broken. All was destroyed by me except the liquor cabinet, at least, and the crystal bottles and spotless glasses inside. I want to but can't bring myself to break that for some reason.

My room was dark but I could see my mess. If the torches were lit I found it all too bright. Everything wasn't right like it use to be, the whole thing was disorderly, I only made it worse and the worse it got the better I felt. Chaos was my embodiment and it is what I make, at least without my Pinetree.

I slid out of the bed, the scraps from my shirt falling from my shoulders, and walked to the door that was blocked by my wardrobe. The door was simple, unlike anything else that involved me, stained oak wood with a triangle carved in it. I knew the other side of the door had a pine tree carved in it. I turned the cold platinum knob and pushed it open. The room behind the door was seemingly endless with my treasures from years past, my catalogs and memories recreated into books from my rebirth and beyond. I walked into it, passing shelves and shelves of memories.

I reached the back of the room where my most precious treasures were buried. My final days as a human or at least the ones that mattered. A slab of broken off stone hung on the wall behind four pedestals that each held a book. Engraved in the stone was the last human memoir of me in the Aztec civilization, an unfortunate prince. Lone heir to the throne when his uncle and aunt couldn't bear an heir rely on the king's younger sister's son.

I picked up the book on the farthest left of the slab and opened it, the room around me vanished into the scene that had unfolded that day.

"But mother," I, a fourteen year old boy, began. "Being chief sounds like a big responsibility."

My mother only huffed at me like I was a stupid child. "Of course it is, child, you will be chief. You will be in charge of everything, make every decision, and see to your own family." she replied. "You should be happy with this, instead of them choosing from her family."

Mother had never liked Uncle's wife since he was first smitten by her. She had always said that Aunt was too timid to be a queen, no sense to whether or not she would be kidnapped by terrible men. Mother especially hated Aunt when Grandmother's attention was swept away by her. I thought Aunt was a nice woman too, she was kind and pretty, she even had a beautiful voice when she sung to the children in the public gardens. I never understood why Mother didn't like her, but Mother never explained why either.

"But," I began again. "Will I be a good chief?" I looked up at the woman who birthed me nervously. She was scary when she became mad and she was always close to mad.

"That doesn't matter, Ah Kin." Mother spat at me. "As long as that woman's kin isn't the next heir. So be happy you were chosen." She stormed off after that without me. It was always like this. She always complained, she was never happy. Even when Father married her. I don't remember him but Grandmother had always said that he was a good man, he treasured Mother and showered her in whatever she wanted. Uncle says that he is happy I look more like my father than my mother, Father was a handsome man and could have had any woman he wanted but he chose Mother. Grandfather had said he was a dim man for choosing such a bitter woman has his bride.