Betrayed (Synacky)

Chapter 11

*TRIGGER WARNING, PLEASE READ AUTHOR’S NOTE AT THE END*

Zacky’s POV           

I had fallen into a deep depression. I can’t eat or sleep, and all my energy seems to have been drained out of me. Johnny and Matt had been over a few times, begging me to talk to them, or at least get up and move around. I couldn’t though. I don’t understand what’s wrong with me, and I don’t know how to fix it.

What hurts the worst is that the one person I want more than anything hasn’t made any effort to talk to me or see me. Is it bad that I want him here more than anyone else? I can’t even tell you how long it’s been since I ran away from him. All the days just seemed to blend together when I’m lying here. I haven’t done anything besides cry and cut. I know I should stop, but it’s the only pain I can control- I need something I can control or I’ll go insane.

I’ve turned into a waste of space, a pathetic excuse for a human. I can’t bear the thought of living like this. I’ve hurt everyone around me. Whenever Johnny and Matt come over I can see the pain in their eyes. I’m sure I’ve hurt Jimmy and Brian so badly that they can’t even look at me anymore. That’s why they haven’t come to visit. They hate me.

I know what I need to do. I pull myself out of bed and drag my useless self into the bathroom. I lean on the sink and look at the mirror in front of me. A person I don’t recognize stares back. Pale, lifeless looking skin, sunken cheeks and dark circles under his eyes. I’m a hollow shell of the man I used to be, the ghost of a once-lively person.

I kneel down on the tiled floor, and pull out sleeping pills and a razor from beneath the sink. I sit back against the wall and stare at the items in my hands. These two friends of mine are going to give me exactly what I need- eternal sleep.

I pour a handful of pills and swallow two or three at a time. Then I take more. Once I’ve emptied the half-filled bottle, I toss it to the side and look at the razor. I drag the bade down my arms countless times, just to make sure. As I drift off into blackness, I hear doors slamming and a man screaming. No I want to say Let me die in peace. But I can’t find the strength.

Okay, so there’s my chapter. I apologize if this triggers anyone or brings back unwanted memories. If you need to talk feel free to message either of us on this account or on my personal account. I hope you liked this chapter, and I apologize for the long wait. I had a crazy week and I couldn’t find the time to write.

~Adele