When you see my truth (drarry fanfic)

Chapter 12. What if I told him?

-Harry's pov-

I heard the sound of the shower as I went down the stairs. I couldn't stop thinking about what's happened lately. The mean git seems to come out less and less lately. Maybe Draco is really about to change? Maybe I can really save him. Not that he deserves me helping him. He has always been such a jerk. Always calling Hermione mudblood and Ron weasel. But then, how kind have we been to him? We call him ferret. That's is just as bad as weasel.

Yesterday, what happened? It didn't even resemble the Draco I knew at all. It was like staring at another person.

He entered the room. Draco wore a white shirt with black pants and a black robe. His hair was wet and he looked awkward. He probably didn't know what to do when he'd made me sleep sitting on the floor the whole night. I gave him a small smile and put the bacon and eggs I prepared on the table.

"Breakfast's ready." I said. He nodded and sat down on one of the chairs.

McGonagall and professor Blythe had left not short after Draco had gone to bed.

Wait, Draco? When did I start addressing him as Draco? Ah... 'Draco... Call me Draco... Malfoy isn't me. Malfoy is my father. Malfoy is the son my father wanted. Not me.'

He said that, didn't he? Yes he did. What did he mean by that? Was he not the son his father wanted? Ha! He's a spitting image of his bloody father, how could he not be?

After breakfast I took a run outside. I really liked the nature here and the paths around the house were very good. I liked keeping my shape good. Come of think of it, Draco was really slim. I mean, before he got with this eating disorder. I noticed it at breakfast. He barely ate anything. I was forced to make him eat at least half of the portion. It was almost as much as a child eats.

--

The first day was uneventful. Draco had gone to his room and stayed there. I checked on him once and he was reading a book on his bed.

Now it's time for dinner and I went up to tell him. He was still on his bed reading. Had he seriously been doing that the whole day?
"Hey, it's dinner." I said.

"I don't want any." he said absent-minded.

"You have to eat something!" I protested. He just shook his head and went back to his book. This is starting to get on my nerves. Is he really going to be like this? Locking himself up in his room and eat as little as possible? Is he really that stupid? I don't have a clue to what has happened to him, or, a clue I have, but nothing more. He can't continue like this. He has to at least eat!

I went up to him and grabbed the book, threw it across the room and took his shoulers and bushed him down into the bed, hard. "Why are you so fucking impossible?!"

-Draco's pov-

He said something, but I couldn't think straight. I closed my eyes tight. I can feel the hands push me down. The panic started to dwell up. I no longer remembered the fact that it was Potters hands. I just felt them, pushing me down. Not again, leave me alone!

-Harry's pov-

Suddenly Draco started kicking and hitting everything around him, I was startled and moved back some steps. Draco got up from the bed. His eyes were sparkling with fear, just like last night. He didn't seem to see clear. He didn't look at me. He ran to the door and threw it open before darting out and down the stairs. I hurried after him, scared that I might lose him when he's in this state of mind.

Draco went outside and ran into the forest. I was both physically stronger and faster, I caught up with him and grabbed his arm, resulting in him turning around and fall against me. I catched him in my arms. He kept resisting but I wouldn't budge. "It's me, Harry. I wont hurt you!" I told him. At last he seemed to calm down and we sat down on a rock. Draco sat on my lap while I held him close to me, slowly rocking back and forth. "Harry." he said, as if he needed to assure himself that it was me. His hands gripped my arms as I hugged him. "Don't leave me, he'll take me. He'll get me. I can never escape from him. Only death is my option. He'll get me..." I hushed him.

I took the shaking enemy in my arms and carried him back to the house. He really does have some serious problems. No shit, I thought. But somehow, it has never got me how serious it might be. I realised last night that it wasn't a game... But... I just couldn't understand it. I didn't exactly know what he's been trough, even if I've seen the scars. I need to talk to him.

--

We sat in the living room, There was two armchairs and a sofa in the middle. We sat on each armchair.

"Draco... You need to tell me what's going on. I don't understand at all. I need to know to be able to help you."

"I don't need your help!" he said.

"You clearly do!" I countered. He looked angry, but didn't say anything. He's had two panic attacks since yesterday, and that's the most feelings I've ever witnessed him showing. Even I could tell that it's not normal even for him to have two panic attacks on such a short period of time.

"I..." he begun. "I don't know what happened, it's been a while since such a thing happened last. It must be the anxiety of not following my fathers orders. Of not doing as he tells me to do..."

"Draco, what does your father do to you? More specific?" I asked. The question startled him and his eyes went blank before he opened his mouth.

"Father punishes me. When I'm bad he punish me."

I waited for him to continue, to use more detail. But maybe he can't. Maybe he can't bring himself to tell anyone, not even me, who he's supposed to so deeply love.

"When... I was a child..." he said quietly. "Around seven years maybe. I had a friend. A very close friend. She was always happy and I loved to be around her. Her father  and mother were muggles. She was a mudblood. Father didn't like me being with her. He called her disgusting, unworthy me.

I was so angry. It was the first time I ever disobeyed father. I met her anyways. So father got mad. He kidnapped her and held her hostage in our dungeons for a week. Torturing her, raping her. Doing terrible things to her. Then my father brought her up.

He put her in front of me. She looked at me with crying eyes, screaming my name, and father told me to choose. Choose her, or him. Choose a perfect life, or a life where my enemy is my father..." he was crying now. "I chose her. I actually did. Mother used to read stories to me about heroes who gives their all to save the people dear to them. I didn't know then exactly what it would mean to choose her, I just wanted her to live. Father was furious. He ripped her apart and shred the pieces over the room. I saw how her intestines spread across the floor.

Father got closer to me. Looked me in the eyes and said. 'You're a Malfoy. Malfoys does not feel anything towards others. Malfoy's does not put anyone's life before their own. You're a disappointment. You do not deserve to live.' That was the last time father ever cared for me, 'cause the same time, father realised that I was a submissive veela."