When you see my truth (drarry fanfic)

Chapter 14. Legilimency and Occlumency

-Harry's pov-

"Today, we'll start to learn about the defence of the mind. It's called Occlumency. We'll also learn Legilimency. This is nothing to be learnt by fifth graders, but because of special circumstances I've been told by headmaster Dumbledore to teach you."

I glanced at Draco to see how he reacted to this. As I thought. Draco's eyes were flickering. He's probably scared. Maybe he thinks that we'll intrude on his mind? I looked back at professor Blythe. It was currently nine o'clock in the morning and we were seated on rocks in the woods. Blythe had told us that he liked the weather and we didn't mind being outside either. It's beautiful, like always.

"Okay, so legilimency and Occlumency goes hand in hand. Occlumency is the art to protect ones mind, and legilimency is the art to look into someone else's. We're first going to learn Occlumency. Now, I assume you're prepared to open your minds?"

At this Draco shook his head violently.

Professor Blythe frowned. "But I won't be able to teach you the art if you refuse to let me try."

"Never, I don't want anyone in my head. Ever." Draco said.

"But then, what if some skilled Legilimens comes along and just penetrates your mind? Wouldn't you feel safer if you could defend it?"

Draco looked thorn. I saw how he was frightened to death by the thought of having someone in his mind.

"It doesn't matter." he then said. "It doesn't matter that I can't protect my mind. I wont be living so long anyways." He looked up, seriousness covered the blondes face.

"It doesn't matter if you're dying or not. This was professor Dumbledore's order and if he wants me to teach you I will teach you. With or without your permission."

-Draco's pov-

I was horrified. He couldn't be serious could he? He wouldn't force his way in to my mind without my permission, right?

"You can't do that!" I looked at Harry. Shocked. Had he said that? Did Harry stand up for me?

"I can't what?"

"You can't force Draco to do something he doesn't want. Dumbledore would never allow that!"

"Well he did. He didn't say the methods I should use, he only said 'teach them Legilimency and Occlumency' so that's what I'm going to do. Don't hate me for following your headmasters orders. I really like you guys but I wont turn Dumbledore down." he said. It was quiet a while. I looked at the ground, shaking. Was he really going to go into my mind? Am I prepared for that? No. NO! I'll never be prepared for that! Just let me die already.

I turned around and ran. I didn't know where, I just ran. Forest, forest, forest. That's all I could see. This was the second time I was running away, and it was the second time Harry ran after. He grabbed me like he'd done once before and held the shaking me like once before. Really, why couldn't he just leave me alone? Why did he have to be like this. This... kind. Why was he kind? Why did he act like he cared?

"Hey... We'll figure something out, all right? I wont let him do something you wont allow." Harry said, and led me back to the place where professor Blythe waited.

"You know..." he begins, as Harry sat down besides me. "Harry could be the one doing the Legilimency thing." he said. I took a sharp breath. Harry? In my mind? That was almost worse than having a stranger there! What if he truly finds out the madness in me? What if he's disgusted with what was done to me? What I have done? I don't want Harry to hate me. That's ironic, I've spent my whole life hating him, and liking him hating me. Now, all I want is his approval. To be near him. But then I was reminded of my death line. How long was it left? One month and a half? Has it really just been two weeks? It felt like months. But then... If Harry saw what had happened to me... If he saw what a fuck up I really was... It would be easier to cope with the time if he just hated me. If he didn't look at me with those eyes. Those eyes filled with pity. I don't want him near me. And my mind could definitely fix that.

So I accepted. I accepted the offer. Harry would be poking around in my head. At least until I got the Occlumency right. I saw that Harry was surprised by my choice. I went in for a nap. Professor Blythe must teach Harry Legilimency before Harry could teach me Occlumency.