Letters For Tessie

Letter 2

Dear Tessie,

They say that if you make at least one friend during your first day, you’ll be just fine. For introverts like me, I prefer to keep myself in the shadows of the ever bright peers in school. Especially in high school, where the rule of the jungle exists.

If high school was indeed a jungle, I would prefer to be a mosquito quietly standing still up on a wall, trying not to mingle with the others. My first class was in English and I still didn’t know anyone. I see faces coming in and sitting on the classroom, like it was your first time in a family reunion and you don’t know everyone but only a select few.

I see one particular fellow, Carlos Pendelton, whom I met a few times because of a common friend from our elementary days. We haven’t talked in years, since we haven’t been in the same class during middle school. But to see each other again in high school was different. Even the same faces might have different personalities now.

Everyone has to go through some changes as time goes by. I didn’t tell you this but during my second year in middle school, I got blinded by my friendliness with others. And like any good kid, I try to learn from my mistakes, and that lead me to not trusting anyone.

And that’s the problem I see here in high school Tessie. I need to make friends, to be part of something so I won’t be left to fend for myself. I feel like I am in a museum of masks I am not familiar with what lies behind each one. Like in some movies, some masks can be alluring and deceiving that a trap actually lies ahead if I continue to approach it.

Hopefully I can find a temporary group to join in. Any people would do, just so I can be left off quietly and not be messed with. I find a group of these so called ‘friends’ in high school to be a necessity to survive. If you think I’m lonely, it’s quite the opposite actually. I enjoy doing things by myself, doing my hobbies alone in the comfort of my own room.

There are 13 of us guys in the room, hopefully I can manage to fit in. But, from what I’ve learned from all these years I spent on school, it’s not about fitting in, it’s about fading out into the background; the sense of being there for everyone to notice you but at the same time, in an instant they take their eyes of you, you just fade out quietly.

I knew a few girls too here in this class. Some of them were previous classmates back in middle school, but I prefer not to interact with them. Take no offense, Tessie, but girls are scary in my opinion so I keep a safe distance between them.

I approach Carlos first. Why him you ask? I’m not sure myself, other than the fact that I’ve met him only a few times before, I guess there’s no more behind my reason. If you were to be in my position, Tessie, I’m sure you would’ve befriended them all instead of selecting a few.

“H-hey. Long time no see.” I said casually, trying not to sound too awkward.

“Hey. You’re… that guy that was always with John before right? Back in elementary.”

“Yeah, I’m surprised you still know me.”

“Well, I’m pretty good with faces.” He smiles and offers me his hand, “Well, hope to get along with you this semester.”

I shook it firm and reply, “Likewise.”

Being in high school is a bit tough, unlike back in middle school, wherein the teachers go to your classroom, it’s now the students who move in to the teachers’ respective rooms for classes. Everyone had their own classes, so I need to mingle out to other people who are in the same classes as I am.

Carlos was one of the few who I share classes with in three subjects: Physics, Physical Education and English. I was sort of relieved that I don’t need to find some random person in pairing up for stretches during PE.

I still need a few more people for my remaining five subjects. My next class was in History while Carlos had Mathematics. As I made my way towards my next class, a girl of shoulder hair length approaches me.

“Hey.” I look at her confused as to what she wanted from me. She continues asking, “Are you… going to History class?”

“Y-yeah.” She smiles and sighs with relief, “Thank goodness! You’ll have to accompany me there.”

“H-huh?” Without any thought about it, she grabs my hand and drags me along the way. At around a minute’s time, we finally reached the classroom. I gasp for a little bit of air as I lost most of it along the way.

She let’s go of my hand and takes out her handkerchief, drying her sweat off.

“W-what was that for?” I ask her as even after all that running, I still don’t understand the reason why.

“What was what for?” she looks at me with a plain look on her face.

“W-why drag me all the way here?”

“I’ll tell you once we get inside class.” I took her word for it and not long after composing myself, I open the door and for some reason I have an idea on to what her reason might be. Sitting in the left side of the middle row, she sits beside me and again sighs.

“Sorry about earlier. I—“

“Let me guess: you freaked out about entering the classroom.” She nods in agreement and looks at me sheepishly, “Regrettably, yes. I didn’t know anyone here.”

“But… I don’t know you either.”

“Earlene Mapletree. Now you know.” She smiles gleefully, “And you are?”

“T-Tyler, Tyler Machalloway.”

“Oh, a good name. Tyler, that is.” I nod my head down. I wasn’t used to being praised and it just feels weird, being praised just because of my name.

“Is… something wrong?”

“Huh? I-it’s nothing… t-thanks.”

“About what?”

“You know, about my name… thanks.”

“You’re weird, you know?” she giggles faintly.

“W-weird?”

“In a good way that is.”

“Your surname’s weird.” I rebutted. “It’s called unique.” I read once in a book that you sometimes find things at the most unexpected time and places. This encounter with her, was one of those things. I never would have expect to have things work out this way. After conversing for a while, we had a lot of similar classes: History, Biology, Arts and Workshop.

Remember what I said earlier, Tessie? That if you make a friend during my first day, they say you’ll be fine. I made two, so where does that place me?

Love, Tyler