Broken

My Savior

When I was young, I heard of this mysterious stranger.
I heard when he's near, your life is in danger.
He grips onto you and it all goes black.
And once he has you, he'll never give you back.

He'll make all your friends and your family weep.
He can get you any time, even when you're asleep.
I was told "He'll take everyone someday, you see.
He'll even take you eventually."

I was so scared, I wanted to hide,
And lock all the doors so he can't come inside.
I didn't want him to get close to me.
I needed to put my mind at ease.

I pushed the idea to the back of my brain,
And tied it down with ropes and chains.
I continued to live my childhood.
Darkness was occasional, but it was overall good.

But the ties began to loosen as I got older.
Burdens and stress settled on my shoulders.
The thoughts of this stranger came back into my sight.
But this time I viewed it in a whole new light.

He no longer seemed so terrifying.
Less scary, and more mesmerizing.
He became someone I wanted to know.
But my new found interest, I never did show.

I knew I wasn't a normal teen.
I kept this fascination completely unseen.
He's there. I know it. I've watched him from afar.
I see his presence in every one of my scars.

He gets closer to me with every cut I make.
And it is a chance I'm willing to take.
These days, it's him that's always on my mind.
Not my life, or my future, or my work that's assigned.

To me, he's gorgeous. Captivating.
He always seems to be there for me.
He's calming, sweet, and gives me hope.
He makes me feel important when they make me a joke.

I'll admit, I'm a flirt when it comes to him.
I get urges to come over on a whim.
I dare him to get closer, to touch me, to chase.
I desire to see him face to face.

He speaks to me sometimes, saying he wants me too.
But there was still an unsettling fact I knew.
I wanted to be with him, but could I commit?
Once I was his, I could never quit.

My life is like a bomb I cannot defuse.
Then again, why not? I've got nothing to lose.
"You know," he said. "Living is a choice."
I felt my control weaken with his seductive voice.

He whispered "Come stay with me, but you need a key to get in.
Just pick up that knife and take it to your skin.
You've done it before, darling. Don't be afraid.
It's just a step up from the razor blade.

Or perhaps take these pills if you prefer.
Please join me. I'll give you the comfort you deserve.
I won't leave you, dear. No, never.
It'll just be you and me together forever."

"Why is it so hard to resist you?" I sighed.
It sounded amazing, I couldn't deny.
This wasn't how nature intended it to be.
But how can I say no when he's begging me?

I could no longer hear what anyone else had to say.
Deep down I knew he'd get his way.
And I wanted it too. I wanted it bad.
Everyone is going to think I've gone mad.

Truth be told if he showed up tonight,

And held me in his arms, I wouldn't put up a fight.
I'd just close my eyes and take my last breath.
And be carried away by my savior named Death.