Kid In Love || Shawn Mendes

Plane Ticket

{Shawn's point of view}

I walked downstairs and made myself a coffee to hopefully make me feel more awake considering I had a sleepless night.

I understand why Charlotte hung up the phone. "I miss you", I said that so out of the blue.
She has probably not got any feelings left for me anymore.
But after her hearing her voice, I don't know, it made me fall in love all again.

I sat down and looked hazily onto my phone.
I sent Brian a text asking if he wanted to come over and play some video games. He's been away for over 4 months to go travelling. He left a month before I went to London to see Charlotte.
He texted back and he was gonna come round in a hour.

I had a shower and got changed before I heard the door knock.
"ITS OPEN", I shouted from my room.
"WHERE ARE YOU MENDES?"
"UPSTAIRS".
I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and before I knew it Brian came in my room and sat on my bed.
"Hey man what's up". Brian asked.
"You want the truth or not".
"Shawn I've been away for over 4 months and no one is telling me what's going on with you...You've cancelled tours and ditched your second album...You can tell me", Brian said reassuringly.
"Remember Charlotte?"
"Of course I remember her, you used to talk about her non stop, wrote a song about her... she's pretty much the love of your life."

"She's pregnant"
"Oh shit"
"Exactly", I replied.
"But you guys are okay though?" He asked.
"Absolutely fucking not"
"Oh god what's happened?" Brian asked.
"She said it wouldn't be fair on either of us if we stayed together because of my career. And that we should carry on our lives as normal."
"I'm sorry Shawn-"
"I just don't know what to do man. I miss her so fucking much. I know it's so stupid but I can't help it. It's not like a high school relationship. Like Lauren. I thought I was in love with her. But Charlotte, oh god. She called me yesterday, told me when her due date was. I said that I missed her and she hung up. All I want to do is go and see her-"

"Then why don't you?".
"I'm scared", I reply.
"Of what?" Brian asked, raising his eyebrow.
"That's she might've moved on. That she's still better off without me. That she might've made the right decision..."

"Shawn, do you think you'll always be in love with her?"

"I think a part of me always will be. I mean how could I not be in love with her? She was my world. She was my everything. She was the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the thought of having her in my arms is what I fell asleep too. She was perfect in my eyes. She gave me a feeling I never had before, like I was important. I finally mattered to someone... And now... She's gone."

"I'm telling you this is a friend, do fucking something about it-"
"What's the point? She hardly kept the conversation going last night... She only told me about the due date because I'm the dad, it's not because she wanted me there".
"I don't think she's over you Shawn."
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"As soon as you said I miss you, she hung up right?"
"Yep... well she paused."

"Shawn, if she paused, it's because she wanted to say it back. But she was scared. Because she ended things not, but not because she didn't love you, but because you couldn't be there for her. She has your baby growing inside her! Of course she misses you."

"All I want is for her to see how much I love her and how I would do anything for her and the baby."
"Well do that then Shawn!"
"How?" I asked.

"By booking a plane ticket and go to see her". Brian said with a huge grin.