My grandma always told me..
''Never ta be on da streets with da gangstas. If you do, ya gon pay son. Karma ain't na joke.''
She always said that when I was little. And even before she died. Sometimes, I'll chuckle when I think of that. I used to be that type of boy that was smart, but not educated. I used to be that boy where I would do chores and other house duties.
I used to be that boy who used to get picked on because I didn't live well. I used to be that boy who was nice. I used to be that boy who played in the dirt with my other cousins, dirty and had to clean our hands in the puddle. I used to be that boy who used to count stars and be outside at certain times of the night. I used be THAT kind of boy.
But now, things have changed. And never be the same. Never be the same.
--
''Man, if you don't come on nigga!'' yelled my nigga, Shawn. I rubbed my eyes and catch up to him. Man, I was sleepy as fuck! I ain't even get no motherfucking sleep because of that nigga Shawn!
''Man, at least a nigga can sleep?'' I reminded him of last night. He smirked and rubbed his hands together. Shaking my head yo.
''Man, she had that good ass head to. Bruh, I tell ya, ha pus-'' I cut him off, I didn't want to hear that shit!
''man, man, it's fine. She's gone, bye bye!'' I said, kind of irritated because this sun was frying me! He chuckled.
''You'll learn soon, my nigga.'' He said as he punched my shoulder and pat my back. I swear, this nigga though.
''Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever man.'' I said, still rubbing my eyes.
We continued our walk, and we were continuing talking. We reached over to the abandoned house-which was our ''HQ''. We walked right in and the smell of weed and sex filled my eyes up. I started coughing. Damn yo.
''Ay man,'' said one of my partners, Graham but we call him G. ''what's up, tho?'' he asked, dapping me. I dapped back and said nun much.
''Oh ard, ay,'' he said. ''boss wantchu'.'' he started smirking and chuckling. The hell he laughing and smiling for? I shook my head and mean mugged him and walked to the back of our HQ.
I reached boss's door and walked in. He was at his desk, kissing some girl. I slammed the door and they looked at me. The boss smiled at me and then whispered something in the girl's ear and smacked her ass, as she was about to get off his laps.
She passed me, and I looked at her ass. That ass though! I licked my lips as she closed the door.
''Aye, my man, Abel!'' he exclaimed happily. I shook my head. Why was he feeling like this today? Damn, everybody happy for some reason.
''Yeah, sup?'' I asked, as I sat in the chair.
''Ah, nun much, nun much.'' He said as he sighed. I shook my head slowly and raised my eyebrow.
''Oh, okay, anyways, you needed me?'' I asked. He looked up and smirked.
''yeah my nigga,'' he said. He opened his drawer and pulled out a bag of money. He slid the bag over to me. I catch the bag before it fell on the floor. I looked at the money in awe.
''Damn bruh!'' I yelled. The boss smiled and laid back in his chair, putting his feet on his desk turning around in his chair. ''where you get all this money at, yo!?'' I asked and yelled at the same time. He smirked and got back to his desk.
''You need it homie. It's for you, bruh.'' My boss said, as he got up, pacing around the room. ''I've heard about how you lived when you was young, Abel.'' He sighed, as he added.
''Man..that was like..long ago yo, I'm coo-''
''no man!'' yelled the boss. ''WHEN I SAY-when I saw, It's YOURS, it's YOURS!'' he yelled. I show no emotions. He just killed my vibe. ''now, end of discussion! Out chu' go.'' The boss shoo'ed me off.
I mean mugged him. I grabbed the bag-which was now mines and walked out. The guys were gone. They were probably at the Strip Club-without me, I thought. I shook it off and walked out.
I walked home-well, my grandmother's home and walked in. I drop the bag and plopped on the couch. I grabbed the controller and turned on the television.
Man, this is a boring night, I thought. Just then, the house phone started ringing. I sighed and grabbed it and answered it.
''Hello?'' I asked.
''Aye, is this Robert?'' asked some ghetto-girl voice. I sighed. The same voice that has been calling for the last four days.
''Naw, like I was before-''
''No! where the fuck is Robert at?! Ya, needa find him or I'm comin' tah' look ova there! You ain't gatta' lie, boi!'' she yelled, cussing me out. Hey! It ain't my motherfucking fault that Robert is out! Chiks these days, shaking my head yo.
''Bitch!'' I yelled. ''I ain't got time fo' da BS! Like I don't even know you, I don't even wanna get tuh' know you at all!'' I yelled.
''You-'' click. I hung up the phone. Bitches needa stop calling here, for real, for real though.
I put the house phone back on the nightstand and continued to watch television.
I started dosing off. I stopped myself-I had to do what I do EVERY single night.
Start taking a lot of unknown pills my grandmother had..
She left them for some reason.
But why?
Did she do it on PURPOSE reasons?
Was it some kind of sign?
I don't know, but I'm tired of asking all these damn questions to myself.
I got up-even though I didn't want to-I got up and went up to the bathroom in the back.
I opened the mirror and saw lots of pill bottles!
I felt a smirk forming on my mouth. I love OVERDOSING.
I remember that time-when I was little-maybe about..when I was twelve-years-old-I tried overdosing myself. And it worked! It worked! I am really, really suicidal then and still now.
You don't know how much I hate my life. Life is nothing. Nothing. Nothing! Why did I even live anyways?
Sigh.
Sigh.
It ain't nun.
Life ain't nun.
I am not about THIS life.
I grabbed EVERY pill bottles and started just opening em' up and putting it in my mouth. Just doing it!
I dropped all the bottles on the floor. I felt kind of woosy. But, I was just fine.
I guess.
I walked out.
Nothing happened.
I got into my grandmother's old bed.
I fell asleep then.
--
YOU ARE READING
Til' I Overdose ☾ᶜˑˢᵒᵒᶰ☽
Fiksi PenggemarDedicated too @MB_Imagines :) Too Mrs.Tesfaye