Simmons's Journal

Wednesday, August 10th

Today, we had the first assembly of the school year. It was about all of the different sports teams we have, and ended with everyone chanting, or rather, screaming, the Alpha Academy fight song. It didn't make any sense, since over time the students have altered the words, but I think it went something like this:

"From Blood Gulch with pride, Freelancers we'll fight,
Won't stop till we win,
Then win again,
Alpha Academy,
Fuck with us, you'll see,
The might of a Flying Snake-
GO ALPHA!"

I don't really get the song, apart from the Freelancers being our school rivals. How does a bird-snake hybrid become a school mascot? How does a gymnasium full of high schoolers manage to work a swear word into their school fight song without administration intervening? Why did my mother move me into a school like this?

I sat by Donut and the others during the assembly. As we were dismissed, I was amused to hear Sarge's idea of what the fight song should have been. "I just wish that Grif was dead, put a bullet through his head," he sang enthusiastically. Grif looked annoyed.

"Come on guys, can't you go five minutes without threatening each other for once?" I heard an unfamiliar voice say. We turned to see four guys walking towards us.

"Hey, guys!" Donut smiled. "Oh, Simmons, I'd like you to meet the Blues." I frowned, puzzled. "Why do you call them the Blues?" I questioned. "Because we're the Reds. It goes back to something that happened in middle school. I'll have to fill you in later." Donut answered. Something about the way he said that felt oddly sexual.

The Blues introduced themselves as Church, Tucker, Washington, and who could forget Caboose, who nearly crushed me in the most suffocating hug I've ever experienced. "Alright Caboose, I think that's enough." Church calmly said, pulling Caboose off. "OKAY, CHURCH!" Caboose happily shouted.

"So, are you guys coming, or what?" Tucker asked. "Coming where?" I questioned, unsure of what was happening. "Since we have half-days when there are school assemblies, we go to McDonald's and hang out afterwards. You can join if you want, seeing as you're a Red now." Grif explained. "I don't see why not." I shrugged, though I have to admit I was internally shrieking at my casual inclusion in their friend group.

At McDonald's, after those of us who were eating had gotten our food, I got to know the Blues better. "...and that's how Church became my best friend." Caboose smiled, finishing his story.

"Oh really? What about that time you and Sheila tried to kill him?" Tucker asked. "THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT!" Caboose screamed. "Oh, I have to hear this story." I chimed in.

"Okay, so Caboose rides his bike to school, which he named Sheila, don't ask by the way because that is a WHOLE other story," Tucker explained, "and one day, in seventh grade, as he's riding his bike, he hits a slick spot, because it had rained the day before. He slams his bike STRAIGHT INTO CHURCH, and knocks him on his ass!" The whole group, including Church (but not Caboose,) started laughing.

"I said I was sorry..." Caboose explained, looking genuinely upset. "Dude, I told you it was fine." Church reassured him. "Besides, it's not like it was intentional." After that, Caboose went straight back to his usual excited self. I couldn't tell if he still felt bad about the bike incident, or if he was just that concerned about Church's approval.

"What's up, losers?" I heard a girl's voice say behind me. When I looked towards it, I saw a swarm of kids who were around our age walking to our table. "Hey, didn't think we'd see you today." Church told them, the girl sitting next to him while her friends brought chairs over for themselves.

"Who the fuck is this?" asked the girl with the purple and green tank top, sounding irritated and gesturing towards me. "South, don't be a bitch. New guy, what's your name?" questioned the girl in the black jacket, next to Church.

After introducing myself and learning the others' names - well, they were actually nicknames (weird ones, of course, as I'm learning is custom here) - and discovering that they attended our rival school, Mother of Invention, I got to know them too. Apparently in middle school, they had split into three groups: the Reds, the Blues, and Project Freelancer, because of some arbitrary argument involving colors. Apparently Washington had been part of the Freelancers, but was the only one who couldn't get into Mother of Invention, so he switched to Blue team. It was also brought up that Church and Tex were dating, as were York and Carolina.

We conversed for a while, and after we ran out of stories to share we decided it was time to leave. I carpooled with Sarge, Grif, Lopez and Donut in Sarge's Jeep.

"Hey, this thing really does look like a warthog!" I teased. Grif groaned, obviously irritated. "It looks like a fucking PUMA!"